Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 803954

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A likely stupid question

Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 9:41:21

In reply to Re: Hey some good info and ideas here, for anyone.... star008, posted by muffled on January 3, 2008, at 22:55:51

It makes sense that everyone's experience is different. But there's something I was wondering, that is probably a very foolish question.

A lot of people here refer to their other parts with group names (like "peeps"). And I was wondering if they minded being referred to that way? If I were someone sharing a body, I don't think I'd like that at all. I think I'd say something like what makes me a "peep" or whatever the term might be, and you not?

Maybe the explanation is just that everyone's experience is different, but that's really hard for me to understand.

 

Never a dumb question Dinah

Posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 10:01:30

In reply to A likely stupid question, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 9:41:21

> It makes sense that everyone's experience is different. But there's something I was wondering,

*thats what I figger too. This particular page makes EVERYbody sound split LOL!!!

> A lot of people here refer to their other parts with group names (like "peeps"). And I was wondering if they minded being referred to that way? If I were someone sharing a body, I don't think I'd like that at all. I think I'd say something like what makes me a "peep" or whatever the term might be, and you not?

*ROFL!!! It IS confusing to me too. I have a part that I struggled with initially that INSISTED that it be called muffled also. I said *I* am muffled, but it said it was called muffled also. I said that was too confusing. Anyhow, we have worked it out. It seems to accept being called Ikid now. Its a good kid really.
I suspect that some peoples peeps might become annoyed by it. Especially initially. But I have found that once things have settled more, when it is understood that there are others, then its logical to say peeps. Cuz otherwise I'd have to say, Ikid, Franchesca, Toughie, Nasty ...etc. Takes too long!
As well, for me, I often dunno WHO I might be dealing with at any given time. Or if there is fussing going on amongst more than one, its just 'fuss', I dunno who. So again, just peeps.

> Maybe the explanation is just that everyone's experience is different, but that's really hard for me to understand.

*It depends on the personality/feelings of the peeps. The hardest thing I find, is that the kids ARE kids. I just cannot grasp how there could be an ACTUAL child inside this adult body. It makes NO sense.
Thanks for taking an interest.
How you doing anyways Dinah?
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question muffled

Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 10:39:47

In reply to Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 10:01:30

It's not *just* taking an interest, Muffled.

It's something I've found rather upsetting, although I totally take ownership of that and am not blaming anyone.

I'm doing very well emotionally. I've enjoyed spending time with my delightful family this Christmas, although I'm still struggling with work. Physically not as well, with perimenopause settling in and with a change in my diabetes medication.

 

Re: Never a dumb question

Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 11:36:55

In reply to Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 10:01:30

and...

Well, kids rarely think of themselves as kids. Or at least not in this area. From the age of at least 8, I remember thinking of myself as a person who just hadn't reached adult height yet. Certainly teens don't consider themselves kids, and are very protective of their identity.

 

Re: Hey some good info and ideas here, for anyone.... muffled

Posted by star008 on January 4, 2008, at 15:52:05

In reply to Re: Hey some good info and ideas here, for anyone.... star008, posted by muffled on January 3, 2008, at 22:55:51

hey muffy,,

it is not taht I am disturbed by the website in general.. It makes me nervous reading about interacting with them and taking care of them and tht stuff. I am okay with the diagnoses of ddnos, ( i think anyway).. It is the working with them that makes me jumpy inside..I don't need to be tested.. i am afraid I know the truth.;).. I don't think it that webiste that disturbs me.. it is just the trying to work with them.

you are right there is very little about ddnos on the net.. probably because it is vague.. I don't lose time but do forget things and get a bit foggy sometimes.. I do have distinct personalities. I don't do things have not memory or doing them and I am aware the kids are there..
I am not sure if they are all aware of each other.. some are, others I don't know..
I don't usually ahve inapproprate swtching but it has happened and I am aware of it and then I just don't say much if I am out in public or something..

this is jsut waht we get to live with.. I saw the part that said when you first find out there is confusion and chaos and I thought about you and how confused you get and the kids all act up.. I get that way too..

gotta get ready for work.. blah.....

 

Re: Never a dumb question Dinah

Posted by star008 on January 4, 2008, at 15:59:12

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question muffled, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 10:39:47

Dinah,,

Mine don't seem to mind being called my "kids".. they dont' have seperate and different names that I am aware of. Even the Peeps doesn't bother them.. I think it is because they have some sense of belonging as in "my Peeps" or my kids.?? I haven't noticed that they care about what they are called.. Might be differnt with some people but this is the way it is for me. Mine seem to know I am older and in charge, (more or less) so belonging to me is just the way it is.. My kids..
better than not belonging anywhere i guess.

 

Re: Never a dumb question)star

Posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 16:09:30

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by star008 on January 4, 2008, at 15:59:12

>better than not belonging anywhere i guess

*exactly. One time I was journalling and my ikid was upset cuz she felt like T didn't think she should be 'here', that she didn't exist of something. And the kid said something about where do I belong then, if not here where? Do I belong in the 'nothingness'?
So that was interesting to me. Why the kid would say that. Cuz where IS she when I am not aware of her? The peeps definately can be active w/o me being aware, but where do they go when I am not aware? IS there a nothing place for them?
And its funny what you said bout interacting w/them that makes you uncomfortable. ME TOO! I just journalled bout that last night. Ooops, looked for it, guess I didn't write it down. Anyways, I have a prob with outright asking them direct questions. Freaks me. Like asking ikid where she goes when she not here....ugh.
I wonder if we fear too much reality.....
Ugh.
Damned confusing...
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question Dinah

Posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 16:13:47

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 11:36:55

Glad you doing OK Dinah.
Doing lotsa thinking too?
I read on somewhere where the Japanese have a theory of two personnas inside, there was some Japanese name for them. It made me think of you when I was reading it.
I should have bmailed a link. Sorry.
So you think you have splitness? Or inner child? Or more defined ego states or something?
I think we all do to some extent.
It can be useful knowlege for when we trying to figger WTF is going on inside....
To me it wasn't scarey really. Just a releife to know. It explained SO much.
Take care,
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question muffled

Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 17:16:43

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 16:13:47

I read a book once about the Japanese idea, I think. It's likely still around somewhere.

I don't know what I consider myself. I don't lose time or anything. But I know I'd spit fire if I referred to myself that way. Seriously. It would not be pretty.

Maybe I'm looking to unionize or something. Rights for nondominant body sharers? I dunno. I seem to have pretty strong feelings tho.

 

Re: Never a dumb question star008

Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 17:28:41

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by star008 on January 4, 2008, at 15:59:12

I guess everyone's experience is different, and I don't want to ask any intrusive questions about your experience. So I suppose all that makes discussion a bit difficult. It sounds as if they don't take over the consciousness?

 

Re: Never a dumb question

Posted by rskontos on January 4, 2008, at 18:20:57

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question star008, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 17:28:41

Dinah, you ask about peeps, I am the one that started calling them peeps. I hate the word alters and my old therapists called them alters. My inners got hateful at that word so I called them peeps someone else on this site called them peeps first and I adopted the terms because I felt comfortable with it at the time. I don't know if my alters are comfortable with the terms or not because we don't talk yet. When they come out I am gone totally for the most part. They do take over my consciousness. I have lost so much time I have lost days and sometimes weeks. I have awaken in different places wearing different clothes. I have bought stuff I don't remember. I have driven places and dont know it. It is scarey but it is. I have met people I swear I don't know but know stuff about me that it is apparent I have meet them but I DONT remember them. So I would fake it sometimes and sometimes I would leave and never call them back. Sometimes I just wouldnt answer the phone. Now if my others have different names i don't know yet. My new doc and I aren't that far. I am scared to find out in some ways. So the question about the term peeps if my doing but I can 't answer it for mine because I don't know what they like. I know they don't like or trust my new p-doc because they try to prevent me from getting there. It takes me 45 mins to 1 hour to drive the 15 mins. it should take. they interfere big time. but we finally get there. He says this is how I know I am doing to the right thing. THey have no reason to trust him yet. They are around to protect me. I just wish they would not use driving to try and stop me from getting there. It is dangerous. But he and I have strategies to help me stay safe. So mine do and can take over my consciousness. I am now better at knowing the signs which my new pdoc Dr. X has helped me know and understand. It is so weird and scary and I have one peep that tries to make me deny their existence. She gets me so worked up. she is the one that usually takes over. I am getting some control over staying but it is more like an out of body experience that I have to fight to stay. Sometimes I can only hear stuff. You can ask me I don't mind. It does help to talk about it however weird it is to talk about. And as my new doc says I am not crazy. I keep saying I feel that way and he keeps saying I am not. Oh and the voices. They can chatter up a storm at least mine can. And the flashes of them I have been getting. When my eyes aren't closed that is new. Have I scared you yet..........let me know when I do....rsk

 

(((Rsk))))thats gotta be hard :-( rskontos

Posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 18:42:42

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question, posted by rskontos on January 4, 2008, at 18:20:57

Glad you got a good p-doc to help you out.
Hang in there.
Nice to see you posting.
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question rskontos

Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 18:43:28

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question, posted by rskontos on January 4, 2008, at 18:20:57

No, I'm not scared. And I don't think you're crazy.

I guess I just have to keep in mind that everyone's experience is different, and what would upset me doesn't upset others, because if it did they'd find a way to stop it, I'm sure.

I hope I didn't upset anyone by bringing it up.

 

Re: Never a dumb question Dinah

Posted by rskontos on January 4, 2008, at 18:58:39

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question rskontos, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 18:43:28

OH no, the peeps term started out as a joke if I recall correctly and it was an easy thing for me to use since any other term bothered me, now that I am coming to terms with my dx, it isn't so bad what they are called. I don't they will mind so much as I don't if my hunch is correct. They are a part of me, they are the part that has the most disturbed parts, the memories, they have all the feelings. I have no feelings, no memories. I am the shell. I am the adult with no memories, no emotions. No connections to the past. When I need to connect I cannot. It is hard to function in the world when you need to go to the parts of you that you need to utitilize that would use those parts and hence the troubles. When you are so badly fragmented and it starts to unravel it gets messy and this is the state I am in now. Some days I seem fine. Other days I seem to be a raving lunatic. Some days I feel fine other days I feel like a bundle of nerves that are like trying to find a calm in a sea of nerve ending waves. I think therapy will find a way to make those connections from me those fragments parts. Neither of my parents parented. Both were ill. So I dissociated all my life until now. I still do actually. Most of the time I am dissociating. I do it well. So well sometimes I am unaware. And I did not know I was doing it.

So no you did not upset me. I can understand how you would think alters might not like the word peeps. For all I know one of them may come out and yell that they hate that word. I just don't know yet. And may not ever know. Everyone's experience is different just like depression is different for everyone. I am sorry if that term upset you. And if in the future one of my alters post forgive me in advance as I can't always stop them...for now this is rsk......


 

Re: Never a dumb question Dinah

Posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 20:09:12

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question muffled, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 17:16:43

> I read a book once about the Japanese idea, I think. It's likely still around somewhere.
>
> I don't know what I consider myself. I don't lose time or anything. But I know I'd spit fire if I referred to myself that way. Seriously. It would not be pretty.
>
> Maybe I'm looking to unionize or something. Rights for nondominant body sharers? I dunno. I seem to have pretty strong feelings tho.

*hmmm. It seems the stuff that triggers us the most is what we supposed to look at.....
Take it easy Dinah.
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question muffled

Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 21:47:37

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 20:09:12

I do look at it. I discussed it today with my therapist.

I like my therapist. He's so calm.

 

Good! Dinah

Posted by muffled on January 4, 2008, at 21:51:18

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question muffled, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 21:47:37

Keep up the good(but hard) work!
My T is calm too.
((( T's )))
I see mine next Tues.
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question Dinah

Posted by star008 on January 5, 2008, at 8:16:40

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question star008, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2008, at 17:28:41

Dinah..

In straight DID alters can take over consciousness.. In ddnos, for me, they don't..ddnos is a category for dissociative disorders that only have some of the criteria for DID, (previously called multiple personality disorder).. hope this helps.. confusing i know..

 

Re: Never a dumb question rskontos

Posted by star008 on January 5, 2008, at 8:27:09

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question, posted by rskontos on January 4, 2008, at 18:20:57

rsk,,

I have trouble getting to my T too.. Even though I have gone the same way to get there for a couple of years and know the area I get lost at the same intersection all the time.!! I hadn't thought that maybe one of them didn't want me to get there. i am there, am aware of where I am but I can't remember where to turn..It doesn't make sense to me to get lost but maybe this is what is happening?? I have suspected that I am late on purpose though.. It happens too often..

 

Re: Never a dumb question star008

Posted by Dinah on January 5, 2008, at 9:37:26

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by star008 on January 5, 2008, at 8:16:40

It's actually not DID without time loss. Or inability to recall greater than what would be expected by ordinary forgetfulness.

My therapist has said that if he were to diagnose me, DD-NOS would be his top choice.

 

Re: Never a dumb question Dinah

Posted by muffled on January 5, 2008, at 10:48:27

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question star008, posted by Dinah on January 5, 2008, at 9:37:26

> It's actually not DID without time loss. Or inability to recall greater than what would be expected by ordinary forgetfulness.
>
> My therapist has said that if he were to diagnose me, DD-NOS would be his top choice.

*oh my goodness Dinah...
Your being so mysterious....
People with DD are just like anybody else often enuf. They function at complex jobs and their life is just fine. There's plenty out there who don't even know they dissociative! Its just not a prob for them.
I had no clue I had a DD before. NO clue. I just had headnoise, blanked, nothing was hard. Had it as long as I'd known. To me it was normal. How could I know any different?
So having a DD is not the end of the world and is considered treatable.
There's also many types of DD, that can be very different.
What type(DSM manual) do you think you lean towards?
So if your worrying that you got a DD, then quit worrying.
Or mebbe I am reading you wrong.
Just I wondered if you was worrying cuz you not saying much.
Post away.
Take care,
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question muffled

Posted by Dinah on January 5, 2008, at 11:04:30

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question Dinah, posted by muffled on January 5, 2008, at 10:48:27

I've never hid the fact that I have a dissociative disorder that does not meet DID standards. If it did, that would be ok too, but it doesn't. The standards for DID are rather precise.

I'm not trying to be mysterious about it. In fact, my attitude toward it is more that of an activist. :)

 

Re: Never a dumb question star008

Posted by rskontos on January 5, 2008, at 12:31:03

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question rskontos, posted by star008 on January 5, 2008, at 8:27:09

Star, I didn't realize this either, it was my new p-doc that told me this was what was going on and that it was proof that I was in the right place at the right time. (meaning changing to him) He also said it would get really messy but we have now identified some things to help me get there safely. I just have to leave really early to drive what should only take 15 minutes. And the days leading up to therapy are a struggle. I start having flashes, I dissociate (he calls switching dissociating, the other T called it switching). And I have a whole range of things that happen. I have noticed that this p-doc who has so much more experience with DID that the other T did he has a much different vocabulary for it as well as insight. The differences are interesting as well as insightful. I am not late on purpose, I have too many "helpers". But he (new doc) says to recognize this is a key to it all. rsk

His take on the troubles getting there is all the alters are trying to protect which is their role. so they try to prevent getting to the place where they felt threatened. It has happened each time I have gone and has gotten worse with each trip.

 

Re: Never a dumb question rskontos

Posted by muffled on January 5, 2008, at 12:38:03

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question star008, posted by rskontos on January 5, 2008, at 12:31:03

Can you take a cab or have someone drive you there Rsk?
Just a thot.
M

 

Re: Never a dumb question muffled

Posted by rskontos on January 5, 2008, at 13:16:45

In reply to Re: Never a dumb question rskontos, posted by muffled on January 5, 2008, at 12:38:03

Muffled, thanks but I have no friends here I could ask, I have not made many here in the years we have lived here and the one I have that knows about my DID just moved. A cab, too scary for me. I hate strangers. But thanks for the thought.

I must confess something before a lid blows here. This thread triggered something. Dinah when I say no it didn't upset me, it didn't me, but it did someone inside of me. I must say this before she comes out. I just deleted a rather nasty posted before she posted it and it was a struggle. So I wanted to confess that in order to maybe calm a storm before it blows up more. Last night I was a seething storm and the triggers set off stuff. So I know you didn't mean it and all, but I need to let you know this from my perspective. Just to let them calm down. Thanks, I will be taking a break from babble to let this blow over as I am not sure what might happen if I don't. rsk


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