Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 791931

Shown: posts 1 to 22 of 22. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 10:52:39

The anxiety is back in full force. I can't stand this. The depression I can live with most of the time but once you add in the anxiety, the suicidal ideation clicks in.

I've left about 42 messages for my T in the last 24+ hours. Just about every hour on the hour, trying to avoid calling her at home. She doesn't usually check her voice mails over the weekend and she clearly hasn't. So now I've called and left her a message at home. But who knows if she's out of town this weekend.

I don't know what else to do. I've called any of my friends I can get a hold of, but they don't know what to do with me either. I feel like I'm going to die. And God knows, most of the time I want to.

Please, please help me.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by angela2 on October 28, 2007, at 11:24:55

In reply to Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 10:52:39

(((((TherapyGirl)))))
Please hang in there. Post on PB if it helps. We are here to listen and support.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** TherapyGirl

Posted by Dinah on October 28, 2007, at 11:28:02

In reply to Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 10:52:39

Do you have any medication that can help? Risperdal usually stops this spiral for me, although there are times when my distress overwhelms its effectiveness.

Anxiety also often responds to physical things. Concentrating on your breathing, meditation, exercise. I've heard yoga is especially helpful.

There were times when it got bad enough for me that I'd just get out of the house and walk around the neighborhood until the worst had passed.

If you don't feel safe, perhaps your local emergency room is the best choice. Or in my area there are several after hours clinics. Are there any in your area? While they might be leery of medications like benzos, they might be willing to give you something to reduce anxiety until your regular doctor is available tomorrow.

Anxiety often produces suicidal thoughts in me, so I focus on managing that as much as possible. The rest is usually manageable.

(Do you have any idea why the anxiety is surfacing right now? Can you identify the triggers?)

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by rskontos on October 28, 2007, at 12:00:55

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** TherapyGirl, posted by Dinah on October 28, 2007, at 11:28:02

When my anxiety is at its highest I have a panic attack, my T has given me ways to try and help myself but usually I need her. I am on lexapro and it has helped some but not all. I agree with Dinah about the walks helping. My pets help me sometimes. Is there a friend that can just be with you no pressure. I have one friend that has come over and just taken my mind off of it, we talked about some of the stuff bothering me and then after a while we finally talked about mundane things and we started laughing and finally I was a little better. Maybe you have a friend that can help you just yourself for a little while and just talk about whatever. It helps sometimes too. If you can just do one small thing for yourself maybe that will help. I understand believe me as I am having more panic attacks lately. But my T and I are working on deeper memories so for me it is unavoidable and part of the process so I am accepting it for now. Good luck keep us posted and you are not alone in this. Sometimes knowing that helps too. Keep posting how you feel and that may help to write it down and get it out. rk

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by DisTraught on October 28, 2007, at 13:08:38

In reply to Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 10:52:39

Hang in there, Therapy girl. Go over to someone's place, sit with them and listen to a CD on mindfulness, or if no one's available, go out for a loooooong powerwalk that will make you tired, or call a clinic if you can afford one.

There's usually a trigger for anxiety attacks. Know what it is?

Hugs
Penny

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by Racer on October 28, 2007, at 14:36:14

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by DisTraught on October 28, 2007, at 13:08:38

I'm sorry you're having so much trouble this weekend. Here are the things I do, which sometimes help:

1. I compulsively read bulletin boards online. After PsychoBabble, I read Knitter's Review, and if necessary move on to Sewing Pattern Review, too. If that's still not enough, I find Wikipedia can also be quite helpful as a distraction.

2. I lie down on the sofa, and pull a quilt over my head, and stay there until I can't stay there anymore. (Frankly, this is by far the most useful for me...)

3. These are the moments that I most appreciate Extended Cable -- even if I can't find anything to watch, searching the listings and cursing about the lack of anything watchable helps.

4. Children's books. Great escapes, and don't take a lot of concentration.

5. Knitting. Just, make sure you're not using this opportunity to try out the latest lace weight in that fabulous Frost Flower stitch pattern. (Go ahead, ask me how I know this one...)

6. Meditation. I don't do "real" meditation, I just do the "sit in chair and repeat to myself that I will survive this." I'm not sure how helpful it is, but it contains it at least.

I hope there's something helpful in there. And I hope you feel better soon.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** angela2

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 14:43:43

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by angela2 on October 28, 2007, at 11:24:55

Thanks, Angela. I'm trying my best to hang in there. Your support is helpful.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** Dinah

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 14:50:19

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** TherapyGirl, posted by Dinah on October 28, 2007, at 11:28:02

Thanks, Dinah. And first of all, I'm so sorry you know the place I'm in so intimately. I hate it for both of us.

Your suggestions are good ones (and very close to what T told me when she called me an hour or so ago). I'm going to go for a walk later and try to pound out the anxiety and get my breathing under control. I hate it when it feels like I can't get enough breath.

Tonight, I'm going the beer-flexeril route (with T's blessing). First thing tomorrow, I'll call my PCP and ask for a prescription for Xanax. I have to be a little careful about those kinds of drugs -- anything that messes with my brain chemistry can backfire in the worst ways. But I like that it's short-acting and doesn't have to be taken every day. So we'll see if that will get me through the worst of it.

I feel more numb right now, which is better than the overwhelming anxiety. If I can get through tonight, I'll have more tools at my disposal.

There is a trigger -- my ex, who I have remained friends with, is starting to see someone else and I believe has become sexually involved (or something close to it). I didn't think that would be this hard for me -- we broke up nearly 4 years ago and I'm the one who did the breaking up. But for some reason it has thrown me for a loop. It doesn't help that there is a child involved who I have no legal claim to. So the minute another party gets introduced, I'm afraid that my role with him will be more limited. And I can't stand the thought of that. I also think my hormones are wonky right now due to my gyn. issues.

T and I are going to work on it all and see where we get with it.

Thanks for the support, Dinah. You are a gem.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** rskontos

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 14:53:33

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by rskontos on October 28, 2007, at 12:00:55

Thanks, RS. I'm with my ex's child right now and that's helping (of course, I'm also getting triggered because I'm at their house). Right now I'm kind of numb. As soon as I get home tonight, I'm going for a long walk. I agree that will help and I thank you and Dinah both for the suggestion. Somehow when I get in that space, I forget the things that have helped in the past. Or else I try the first few things and when they don't work I just give up.

I'm sorry you know how this feels. It really, really sucks.

Thank you so much for being so responsive.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** DisTraught

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 14:55:16

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by DisTraught on October 28, 2007, at 13:08:38

Thanks, Penny. I do know what the immediate trigger is (see post to Dinah above). There are also hormone and job stress issues that I think are exacerbating the trigger.

I'm with my ex's son right now and will be until early evening. As soon as I get home after that, I'll head out for a walk.

I also have several mindfulness CDs. Thanks for reminding me about that. And thanks for responding.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** Racer

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 14:57:53

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by Racer on October 28, 2007, at 14:36:14

Those are great suggestions, Racer, and I appreciate them. I don't know how to knit, but maybe I need to learn.

And I like the mantra you repeat. At its height, I can't breathe at all, but I'm guessing I can get it together enough to repeat that.

I'm sorry you have such a useful list at your fingertips (sorry that you've been in this place that much). I'm very grateful, though, that I have your knowledge at my fingertips.

Thanks.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by rskontos on October 28, 2007, at 15:46:25

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** Racer, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 14:57:53

TherapyGirl, I do admire you for staying in this child's life and with the lastest developments it is going to be hard on you. But you are the gem in his life I hope he and his dad realizes it!!!! You are risking alot to stay connected to him but in the long run the connectedness might help you too. You are doing an amazing thing! I admire your courage. Hang in there you are doing good!!! rk

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** TherapyGirl

Posted by Racer on October 28, 2007, at 16:52:28

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** Racer, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 14:57:53

> Those are great suggestions, Racer, and I appreciate them. I don't know how to knit, but maybe I need to learn.

Knitting can be a great, mindless way to spend time. I find having something to do with my hands helps me a lot.

>
> And I like the mantra you repeat. At its height, I can't breathe at all, but I'm guessing I can get it together enough to repeat that.

For breathing, that's one thing I guess i do have a "real" trick: I count -- "in-two-three-four/out-two-three-four" and concentrate on where they air is going, aiming at having it get way down to my belly, and out to the sides. That, and making sure I'm keeping my shoulders back and down while I'm breathing really makes a difference for me. I highly recommend it.

For what it's worth, I learned the breathing because I'm a very timid rider, and get scared on horses a lot. So, remembering to breath helps a very great deal, and the consequences of falling apart are usually higher than when I'm having a panic party at home. I swear, cross my heart and -- never mind -- the breathing makes all the difference in the world for me. If you retain any one thing from this post, I hope it's that...

I hope things get better for you today.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** Racer

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 19:00:24

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** TherapyGirl, posted by Racer on October 28, 2007, at 16:52:28

Thanks, Racer. They are a little better -- I'm at least numb now. I'm getting ready to go for my walk. I just got home.

I'll print out your breathing instructions and try again -- when I'm in the midst of it, I can't think how to make myself do it. You know? So having the printout will definitely help. I also like the specifics of your suggestion.

Thanks again for the support.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** rskontos

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 19:02:27

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by rskontos on October 28, 2007, at 15:46:25

Thanks, RS. And this little guy is definitely worth it. I just have to remember that during the worst of this.

I'm headed out for my walk now. (Half a beer down...)

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by happyflower on October 28, 2007, at 19:05:48

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** TherapyGirl, posted by Racer on October 28, 2007, at 16:52:28

((((((TherapyGirl)))))))) I am so sorry you are going through such a scary time. I am glad your T called, when do you see her next? I hope the xanax helps you and causes no problems for you. You are such an angel to "your" child. You don' have to be a birth parent to be a real parent. I wish I had someone like you when I was a little kid. Take care, I hope you feel better soon.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** happyflower

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 19:36:38

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by happyflower on October 28, 2007, at 19:05:48

Thanks, HF. I don't feel much like an angel right now, so thanks for saying that.

I'm not scheduled to see T until Thursday, but I have asked for an extra session this week. I'm really hoping she can fit me in on Tuesday.

Thanks for caring. I hope your little one is hanging in there still.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by I need a hug on October 28, 2007, at 20:35:37

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** happyflower, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 19:36:38

TherapyGirl,
What Racer was describing to you is called diaphragmatic breathing. It's worked wonders for me for anxiety and my mom had emphysema and it helped her. Try Anxietycoach.com. Hope you feel better.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** I need a hug

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 20:49:43

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***, posted by I need a hug on October 28, 2007, at 20:35:37

Thanks for the tip. I'm going to look it up right now.

 

Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers***

Posted by I need a hug on October 28, 2007, at 22:51:40

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** I need a hug, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 20:49:43

Good luck. Keep me posted. That was the just the first site that caught my eye when I typed in diaphragmatic breathing. You might find something better.

 

Re: I saw my doc today

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 29, 2007, at 19:16:32

In reply to Re: Please help... ***Possible Triggers*** I need a hug, posted by TherapyGirl on October 28, 2007, at 20:49:43

I got an appt. with PCP today. I've only been seeing her since last spring but I really like her. She talked to me a while, did an EKG (it was fine) and then gave me a Rx for Xanax. She wants me to take it every night for a week and then just as needed. We are trying to be careful to not screw with my brain chemistry any more than we have to. She also asked if I was in therapy, so I think that's a good sign that she's a good doc.

So now if it will only work. When I talked to T yesterday, she did point out the somewhat obvious to me: My ex and I didn't really break up as much as we just stopped sleeping together. Otherwise, not much about our relationship has changed (mostly due to the kid).

I'm thinking this is going to be hard. So what's new?

 

Re: I saw my doc today

Posted by I need a hug on October 30, 2007, at 2:21:59

In reply to Re: I saw my doc today, posted by TherapyGirl on October 29, 2007, at 19:16:32

Hang in there! Can't write now. Terrible migraine.


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