Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 613399

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My T is talking about termination on 4th April

Posted by milly on February 26, 2006, at 7:14:51

I am gutted, I can't believe he can just say that.

I know that at the outset 6 months was mentioned and it will be 7 months but I never actually believed he would just end it like this.

Have tried covering my ears and behaving like Gollum (Lord of the Rings) Yelling 'I'm not listening' but it hasn't worked and he has still said it.

I feel about as attractive as Gollum as well, maybe that is why I'm being given my marching orders, I'm just so gross.

How come he get to decide that it's over

Pretty desperate today
milly

 

Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April

Posted by happyflower on February 26, 2006, at 7:41:56

In reply to My T is talking about termination on 4th April, posted by milly on February 26, 2006, at 7:14:51

((((((Milly))))) You must be feeling pretty sad right now. I can't imagine the pain that it is causing.
I forget how long have you been seeing him? Did he tell you he only does therapy for a certain amount of time or does he think you are okay now?
I know my T doesn't believe in long term therapy either, but he said he will trust me to deceide when I have had enough. But I am sure if I really dragged my feet, he would bring it up.
I hope he will work with you on these feelings of yours in the upcoming sessions. (((((Milly))))

 

Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April happyflower

Posted by milly on February 26, 2006, at 8:04:34

In reply to Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April, posted by happyflower on February 26, 2006, at 7:41:56

Thanks HF, the hugs meant alot.

I haven't told anyone IRL I think I'm in denial.

It is just too painful to think that he won't be in my life anymore, sometimes he has been the only reason to get out of bed and even the only reason not to drive my car into a tree.

I think it ending it is probably tied up with money as in the UK I don't pay him the state does.

I think if I let the tears come I'll drown in them
milly

 

Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April milly

Posted by Dinah on February 26, 2006, at 10:54:49

In reply to My T is talking about termination on 4th April, posted by milly on February 26, 2006, at 7:14:51

Milly, I'm so sorry.

I sometimes think the UK system may be free but it's also rather cruel. The same with student services in the U.S. They give you just enough time to get attached, and then yank you away.

It's got nothing to do with you, you know. It's an story we've heard more than once. It's the system. The system stinks, and your therapist probably doesn't have much choice. I think the fact that he gave you one month more than he originally told you tells you that he did what he could.

((((Milly))))

 

Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April Dinah

Posted by milly on February 26, 2006, at 11:39:28

In reply to Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April milly, posted by Dinah on February 26, 2006, at 10:54:49

Thanks Dinah

thanks for the hugs too - I feel so alone with this.

i actually found babble through you! and your recomendations of 'In Session'. i bought the book and it really helped me, so your words have always had a special place for me even though I don't know you very well or your situation.

I keep thinking i am being punished by him ending it but i'm sure you are right and he is dictated to by the system! which sucks!

I need to know if he will be sad to see me go but I don't know if I can ask

(((dinah )))
milly

 

Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April milly

Posted by Dinah on February 26, 2006, at 11:44:55

In reply to Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April Dinah, posted by milly on February 26, 2006, at 11:39:28

Of course you can ask!! And you can tell him how sad you are to be leaving, and how premature it feels. And exactly what you think of the system.

Thanks for the kind words, Milly. It means an awful lot to me to think that I can in any way help people here.

 

Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April milly

Posted by Tamar on February 26, 2006, at 20:33:37

In reply to Re: My T is talking about termination on 4th April Dinah, posted by milly on February 26, 2006, at 11:39:28


> I need to know if he will be sad to see me go but I don't know if I can ask

I agree that this is a good question to ask. I also wonder whether you can ask him about the possibility of seeing him again in the future if you need to. I expect it will be possible.

Termination is a sad time (I've been there before) but I think it helps if you can talk to your therapist about it quite a bit and tell him how you're feeling about it.

I'll be thinking of you.

Tamar


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