Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 426079

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Feeling a bit paranoid

Posted by Dinah on December 8, 2004, at 7:51:18

We went to see the play therapist my therapist recommended from his old center yesterday. Just to help my son with the stress of this time, with two grandparents dying and two stressed out parents not really getting along well.

She's very nice, and I think she's a first good recommendation from my therapist.

But I got some feeling from her, and from some of her questions about me (because of course children's therapy is also family therapy and they like to get a full picture of the family situation) that she has heard of me. Not by name or anything. But maybe when I told her how long I'd been seeing my therapist, she put together some old conversations with my therapist (because most of his work is short term and I'm his only really long term client), or I don't know if they talked about clients at their weekly meeting, but maybe something like that.

But there just seemed to be some recognition in her remarks and questions. One of the more specific things was that she was surprised when she thought I was still seeing the pdoc from h*ll. Was that because he drives everyone away? Or because she had heard of our difficulties...

BTW, one huge mark for her is that she clearly doesn't like said pdoc. :) One of the weirdest and most disturbing thing about my therapist is that he does like him. Of course, he's uncommonly good with difficult people, or I'd not still be his client I guess.

Anyway, I guess I'll ask my therapist, but I hate asking questions when I'm not sure how I'll feel about the answer. What if he tells me "Dinah, I never gave you a second thought once we left session. I never asked for collegial input, that's for sure." Or, since I know he had serious doubts about whether he was being any use to me for a long time, what if he said he *did* talk about me.

I can't see a good answer to the question, so maybe I should keep my suspicions to myself. She doesn't seem to hold whatever she may possibly heard against me. And maybe she just inferred a lot of that stuff.

 

Re: Feeling a bit paranoid Dinah

Posted by littleone on December 8, 2004, at 20:33:46

In reply to Feeling a bit paranoid, posted by Dinah on December 8, 2004, at 7:51:18

> BTW, one huge mark for her is that she clearly doesn't like said pdoc. :) One of the weirdest and most disturbing thing about my therapist is that he does like him. Of course, he's uncommonly good with difficult people, or I'd not still be his client I guess.

Dinah I had to laugh at this. Especially the thought of your therapist being weird and disturbing. Isn't he supposed to be the "normal" one??

> Anyway, I guess I'll ask my therapist, but I hate asking questions when I'm not sure how I'll feel about the answer.

I know exactly what you mean. I recently asked my T something and thought of all the answers I could get and how I'd feel about each one. He gave me one of the anticipated answers, but my reaction was completly not what I had anticipated and I guess I'm still struggling with it now.

I guess you probably should ask him no matter how you think you'll feel about the answer. If you don't, won't it just sit there between you both festering away? I always want to know the truth about things. At least you know where you stand and how things really are.

I keep thinking about that saying. How assuming things will make an A$$ out of U and ME.

Then again, turning a blind eye has a certain appeal too. So I guess this hasn't been any help at all really. Sorry about that.

 

Re: Feeling a bit paranoid littleone

Posted by Dinah on December 9, 2004, at 0:00:16

In reply to Re: Feeling a bit paranoid Dinah, posted by littleone on December 8, 2004, at 20:33:46

I suppose weird and disturbing isn't how I would generally describe my therapist, but it would be how I generally describe liking my ex pdoc. :( But like I said, my therapist is awfully easy going in some ways and accepting people as they are is one of those ways. I should be (and am) grateful for that. But I wish he hadn't referred me to it. He was associated with the clinic though, so I guess everyone got referred to him.

I remembered the other thing that made me feel funny. She had asked me generally about my mental health, and I gave her a generic sort of answer. Then she asked me what meds I was on and I told her. And she sounded a bit surprised and maybe even disapproving when she asked if I considered the meds I was on to be sufficient. (I'm on almost nothing.) I didn't *think* I present badly enough to elicit that reaction, and I'm reasonably confident of my ability to read emotion, and I didn't list any problems that would warrant more medication. I *suppose* it could be because I did tell her that I used to SI some...

I'm still not sure if I'm going to ask him. I'm pretty sure he'll say no, he didn't discuss me, so maybe I'll just pretend I asked him and he said no.

 

Re: Feeling a bit paranoid to Dinah

Posted by coral on December 9, 2004, at 10:56:15

In reply to Feeling a bit paranoid, posted by Dinah on December 8, 2004, at 7:51:18

Dear Dinah,

It could be that she's extremely competent, especiallly since you have positive feelings toward her.

At one time, I spoke w/my therapist about someone I was having difficulty with and was absolutely floored that he SEEMED to know the person. I know his ever meeting him was an impossibility but he seemed to know this guy so well you would've thought he'd been with him since the moment of his birth.

And, for what it is worth, the therapist was right on the money about how to handle this guy.

Coral

 

Actually not paranoid

Posted by Dinah on December 10, 2004, at 13:53:00

In reply to Re: Feeling a bit paranoid to Dinah, posted by coral on December 9, 2004, at 10:56:15

My therapist said it's possible, he doesn't remember, if she was part of consultation conferences where he may have discussed me, not by name. But I'm pretty identifiable by other things like length of therapy. But he said she was more likely to have known about my problems with the pdoc than she would have been to know more sensitive information.

I feel a bit weird about it, I must confess.


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