Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 424560

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Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long

Posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

I just had to post that I had a good therapy week.

My T gave me some great validation, although he was desperately trying not to, as approval from others is one of my issues. But he caved (grins) and said that I was on the right track, that he was glad to see I was open to pursuing what might be really painful, and that he didn't think that was being passive. (He had said I was passive last time, which made me about as mad as the pdoc saying I was childish. A good indicator that it was the truth).

So I left therapy smiling and happy for perhaps the first time ever. And, I didn't do anything to sabotauge that good feeling or to contradict him to "prove" I was not so good. Yea me!

Then I saw the pdoc later in the week. I told her about the body experience I had during my massage, and then about the next T session when I broke down. I told her my fears, but that I was content to not chase down unremembered memories. She had the best, most comforting explanation! (She works with kids, too). Anyway, she thought it was about a 100 percent guarantee that I had a catheter during the surgeries I had as a toddler. And perhaps even when I had a serious illness and was hospitalized at age 5. Even if I didn't, inevitably, there were "strangers" cleaning me up and diapering me. Woo hoo! It was the catheter! I felt like I was walking on clouds when I left there.

Perhaps I am latching on to her explanation because I need to. But it just felt like it made so much sense, and was such a relief.

Plus, this woman, the pdoc who said I was being childish during our first session called me "tough" this time.

I feel like dancing. It's such a nice feeling, and it startled me when I recognized it. This is that feeling that begins with an "H"...two syllables...sounds like "slappy"...Oh! I remember this!

I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts. I wish this feeling for all of you.

Warmly,
gg

 

Lol Glad to hear it very happy for you :) (nm)

Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 5, 2004, at 1:58:55

In reply to Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long, posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

 

Yeah You! gardenergirl

Posted by Aphrodite on December 5, 2004, at 7:01:12

In reply to Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long, posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

GG, I had been wondering how this was developing. Your pdoc's explanation seems very likely, and obviously it struck a chord. It's amazing how these realizations can help! (I'm also glad to hear that your relationship with your pdoc has evolved so nicely!)

Your T sounds like he knows when you do need that positive feedback. If he withdraws praise/encouragement too much, you're going to eventually be at a loss. Seems like he found a good balance.

I'm so "h-in' slappy" for you!

 

Thanks for sharing that! gardenergirl

Posted by Dinah on December 5, 2004, at 8:49:23

In reply to Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long, posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

I'm so happy for you. :)

But I also delight in hearing stories where our and our therapists' hard work pays off.

 

Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long gardenergirl

Posted by fallsfall on December 5, 2004, at 9:22:06

In reply to Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long, posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

Awesome. It makes complete sense.

It still amazes me how traumatic hospitalizations are for small children. They really don't understand what is going on. And then we carry the misconceptions with us when we are grown.

I'm really happy for you - that the pieces are starting to fit.

 

Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long gardenergirl

Posted by Shortelise on December 5, 2004, at 12:05:47

In reply to Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long, posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

GG What good news.

This is such a delicate subject.

Things like having a catheter, or doctor's exams, or getting meds administered - there are so many things that can feel violating to a small child. And there are many things that are painful. Like a catheter. OUCH!

It's important for me to be open to the possibility that these body memories could be something like what you describe. I hate being touched by doctors. Hate it. Have left emerg because I couldn't endure it. I hate having to take my clothes off. Just with docs. I'm ok with massage therapist, husband, etc.

Isn't happiness grand? It's what makes it all worth it. Those times when everthing floats. I'm so glad for you!

ShortE

 

Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long gardenergirl

Posted by daisym on December 5, 2004, at 14:20:03

In reply to Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long, posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

GG -

I feel your smile all the way out here. I'm glad you have been able to connect all these pieces and didn't just dismiss those feelings.

Being on the right track is so important, isn't it? It makes me feel steady, even when it is hard. I'm glad you were validated about that.


I hope it lasts at least through out the Holidays.

:) Daisy

 

Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long

Posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 20:55:27

In reply to Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long gardenergirl, posted by daisym on December 5, 2004, at 14:20:03

Wow,
I just read everyone's response here, and it just seemed to reinforce my good feeling. Thank you all for that. Wowsa this is nice.

gg

 

Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? gardenergirl

Posted by Poet on December 5, 2004, at 23:22:36

In reply to Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? long, posted by gardenergirl on December 5, 2004, at 1:53:20

Hi GG,

Not to sound sappy, but I'm happy for you. Finding the connection to the preverbal memory is something to be happy about.

Poet

 

Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? Poet

Posted by gardenergirl on December 8, 2004, at 23:21:18

In reply to Re: Goodbye preverbal pain for now...hello happy? gardenergirl, posted by Poet on December 5, 2004, at 23:22:36

Thanks Poet. I hope you are doing well.

gg


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