Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 394843

Shown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

miss old therapist

Posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 10:38:50

I want my old therapist back (i moved). I have been seeing a new therapist and i can't talk to her. I had been e-maililng new t lots (she said it was okay), but now b/c i still can't talk in sessions(it's been like 6 weeks maybe) she doesn't want me to e-mail her anymore. She said I could write stuff and bring it in, but I don't think I'll do that b/c I don't want to be right there when she reads it. I really miss my old t b/c she knew how to get me to talk and she knew the whole story with me. this sucks. and i also feel like i have already been annoying her b/c of my e-mails & thats why she really wanted me to stop.

 

Re: miss old therapist

Posted by rockymtnhi on September 25, 2004, at 15:47:00

In reply to miss old therapist, posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 10:38:50

Lonelygal,

This does not sound like a good match for you. It sounds like you have been going to therapy long enough for you two to be in sync with one another.

Perhaps your therapist wants to see how you present what you are saying in the email so she can offer some support. Anyway, you have support from your babblers.

 

Re: miss old therapist

Posted by gardenergirl on September 25, 2004, at 17:32:04

In reply to Re: miss old therapist, posted by rockymtnhi on September 25, 2004, at 15:47:00

It sounds really difficult for you now. Has your new T been in contact with your old T (with your permission, of course) to get your old records or to consult? Maybe your old T can help your new T to understand what clicked between the two of you and how it happened.

And I do think I understand how your T wants to have you bring the emails in. It's another step towards being able to talk in session. But if it is too hard for you, I would encourage you to try to talk to your new T about how hard this is for you. As honestly as you can. Even if you are worried you will insult her or hurt her feelings, you need to tell her what is going on inside with you that is making it so hard.

I know that may be just as hard as talking about what brought you to therapy in the first place, but it may lead to you feel closer to her and able to talk. Or it may show you that you two just aren't a good match and it is time to look elsewhere. But wouldn't it be good to know?

Good luck. Therapy is so hard. Good for you for pursuing it!
gg

 

Re: miss old therapist

Posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 18:39:12

In reply to Re: miss old therapist, posted by gardenergirl on September 25, 2004, at 17:32:04

hi gg. my new t has talked on the phone with my old t once the very first week. i'm not sure exactly what they talked about, but new t didn't seem too interested in getting my old records. in fact, i wanted to receive a copy of my old records, had e-mailed my old t, the old t never e-mailed me back saying she would send them, but mentioned to the new t that i had requested them. Its been over a month and I still haven't received my records from old t. I wrote an e-mail to director of clinic to try to get my old records today (i tried to be really nice and not say anything to accuse old t, just that i wanted my records). I dunno if I'll ever get them. After reading the posts above from li hing i am really scared to see what she would have to say about me. It would really hurt to see mean things.
I really feel awful. I guess therapists have to fake that they like the client. I want someone to be on my side and actually really care about me. I guess that will not happen. Maybe I shouldn't go to therapy anymore. It does cost a whole lot and I'm still in school too. I'm so sad.

 

above for gg (nm)

Posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 18:40:07

In reply to Re: miss old therapist, posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 18:39:12

 

Re: miss old therapist rockymtnhi

Posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 18:42:39

In reply to Re: miss old therapist, posted by rockymtnhi on September 25, 2004, at 15:47:00

umm, i took a long time to talk to old t too, but i guess i thought that since this is my second time around, i would talk sooner.
i dunno. maybe we aren't a good match either. i feel like its more about me and that i would probably act similarly with anyone though.
right now i'm really feeling down about the whole thing and so alone, i dunno if i'll continue going. i dont' believe that she or anyone would care.

 

Re: miss old therapist lonelygal

Posted by gardenergirl on September 25, 2004, at 20:11:12

In reply to Re: miss old therapist, posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 18:39:12

> Its been over a month and I still haven't received my records from old t. I wrote an e-mail to director of clinic to try to get my old records today (i tried to be really nice and not say anything to accuse old t, just that i wanted my records). I dunno if I'll ever get them.

Hi LG, they might be waiting to receive an official "release of information" form. Your new T should be able to help you with this, or you can ask the director or someone at the old place what the procedure is. In my state it is state law that you have access to your records. It varies from state to state, but you might want to check into that if you do want to pursue this. Some places want you to go over the record with someone who can explain the documentation process and meaning to you in case you have questions or concerns.

> I really feel awful. I guess therapists have to fake that they like the client. I want someone to be on my side and actually really care about me. I guess that will not happen. Maybe I shouldn't go to therapy anymore. It does cost a whole lot and I'm still in school too. I'm so sad.

Well, I can only speak from my training and experience in working with clients...but I never had to fake liking a client. I genuinely cared about and liked all of mine. Some I had to search a bit harder for what was likeable, but I always found something. I can't say that all T's do this. But they are supposed to be genuine. Liking a client is not actually a requirement for good therapy, but I believe the client can tell if you are not coming from a genuine place.

Do you think you might be able to discuss some of this with your new T?

gg

 

Re: miss old therapist gardenergirl

Posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 22:46:06

In reply to Re: miss old therapist lonelygal, posted by gardenergirl on September 25, 2004, at 20:11:12

i wish you were my therapist :( . you seem really really nice.
i don't know if i'll even talk when i see my t on wed. i'm not sure if i'll bring in anything i've written either. i just feel like i'll be way too uncomfortable. i need to be alone for me to be able to think and express myself. when i am with someone else, i want to hide everything and pretend i'm fine & i'm scared of getting upset or emotional. well, i'm very embarassed to just sit there staring at the floor too.... i dunno.

 

Re: miss old therapist lonelygal

Posted by gardenergirl on September 28, 2004, at 19:57:54

In reply to Re: miss old therapist gardenergirl, posted by lonelygal on September 25, 2004, at 22:46:06

Awww, thanks, sweetie. I wish I could make things easier for you. I see my T on Wednesday, too. So think of us doing this together although not right together. And talk about discomfort talking....just pretend you are talking to yourself. Don't look at her...close your eyes, talk as if you are writing in your journal...

Whatever works... But when you are ready, you will. :)

gg


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