Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 374374

Shown: posts 1 to 22 of 22. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

feeling low

Posted by Angela2 on August 5, 2004, at 12:53:15

I went to therapy and came out feeling unsure of myself for some reason. I really feel so insecure about my future. Maybe I'm just an insecure person.

 

Re: feeling low Angela2

Posted by partlycloudy on August 5, 2004, at 13:07:01

In reply to feeling low, posted by Angela2 on August 5, 2004, at 12:53:15

Angela, I know that you haven't been very happy lately. Did you have difficulty talking to your therapist today? Can you pin it down to a particular thing you're dissatisfied with?

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 5, 2004, at 16:57:17

In reply to Re: feeling low Angela2, posted by partlycloudy on August 5, 2004, at 13:07:01

Hi, I too have been having a hard time lately. My dreams have been really disturbing. You would call them nightmares. Fire, destruction and a feeling of complete loss of self control.
I have been crying hard in my dreams.
what is going on? I have felt confused all day today.
Are we all having seperate experiences or is there something more collective happening?
I just don't know.

 

Re: feeling low partlycloudy

Posted by Angela2 on August 5, 2004, at 18:18:47

In reply to Re: feeling low Angela2, posted by partlycloudy on August 5, 2004, at 13:07:01

We were talking about school. And how I'm preparing for it. Because going to school is hard for me. And preparing for it will make me ready to deal with the problems I have there. So we're talking about it and basically her opinion and advice to me is that I should definitely go to school and not drop out but she said: "it's ultimately your decision." Which made me realize that I've basically been going to school to please my parents (mainly my mom). And because she's been telling me what to do. If I could decide I would decide not to be there. And that totally freaks me out because its the wrong decision. I would get a job. Partlycloudy, I have just been worried that my mom would completely not allow it. So I talked to her later today and she said that she would prefer I stay in school but she can't do anything about it because I'm 21. We talked more, like, seriously about it. And I felt better because she was finally treating me like an adult and we were both treating each other with respect. I'll talk to you more later I guess. I don't really feel like talking more about it now. I still feel pretty crappy.ttyl

 

Re: feeling low Jai Narayan

Posted by B2chica on August 5, 2004, at 19:13:40

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Jai Narayan on August 5, 2004, at 16:57:17

Hey Jai, what the heck is going on?
tuesday night (right after my T appt of course) i had four nightmares that night! Horrible i remember once waking up Terrified, frozen and it took all i had to squeeze the sheets. i was trying to tell myself i was in bed, i was ok, that it was all just a dream, but i couldn't even move my head to look around...terrified!
and that's not to mention the other three. was it something i ate?
since then i've been taking my sonata, poppin them like tic tacs cuz i don't want no more dreams for at least a few days to catch up...i'm exhausted.
???B2c???

> Hi, I too have been having a hard time lately. My dreams have been really disturbing. You would call them nightmares. Fire, destruction and a feeling of complete loss of self control.
> I have been crying hard in my dreams.
> what is going on? I have felt confused all day today.
> Are we all having seperate experiences or is there something more collective happening?
> I just don't know.

 

Re: feeling low Angela2

Posted by B2chica on August 5, 2004, at 19:50:42

In reply to Re: feeling low partlycloudy, posted by Angela2 on August 5, 2004, at 18:18:47

((((Angela))))) dear. i am so sorry you are feeling this way.

and the decision you will be making is not an easy one, but the answer for you will be clear once it's decided. my main advice-Have NO doubts about your choice.


sometimes the simplist things in life (like what juice to make) can feel overwhelming for us. Remember that you are dealing with a lot and it only takes a small straw to "break the camels back".
You are 21 and you should certainly be doing what you want to do. Now keep in mind i am HUGE on education so this is just IMHO...but if you're 21 i'm guessing you are pretty close to finishing you degree? i personally would say if you're close to keep going. and i mostly say that because of job options out there, any degree will help.

however! First- you can switch your major to anything your heart desires! AND!!
even if you keep going, you don't need to go full time. only take as many classes as you can balance, heck just one if you want. And maybe you do need to take a semester off. and maybe you need to do that to decide where you are headed in life? i went to college straight out of HS, but that next year stayed out...my parents were FURIOUS! but i moved out of their house and said i need a year for me i did, and it helped me to decide my direction and the following year i went back. and i also worked through school (my rambling point here is that it took me longer than average to graduate but i did and never regret taking that year off)

ok, and more of my stupid 2c but...the spring semester of this year i went into the hospital in mid march and just wasn't the same after i got out...my mind was just mush so i took incompletes on my 2 classes. i finished them when i could. i was supposed to graduate in august but had to put that off cuz i just couldn't handle a summer session not to mention those incompletes.
Finally today i talked with my advisor and am going to register for my fall final class-i am scared to death that i will break but my Advisor knows (told him today) about my mental illness and how it's been affecting me and that i may need to do an incomplete on this project course which would postpone my Graduation till next spring. now the thought of this literally makes me sick to my stomach...i had things all planned out. But I'm even more afraid that i will end up back in the hospital...or worse 6' under. All i know is that i have to take one day at a time and if i start to fall to STOP SCHOOL. the world will not collapse if you or i stop. We ALL MUST put our health first. we must stay balanced or else we just won't function well (if at all). we are then cheating ourselves of what this life Can be like.

Long lecture short.
You MUST do what you think is best for you and your health. Only you know the answer for that, not your advisors, not your T and certainly not your parents. and remember No parent wants to hear that their child is "dropping out" of school, so expect to hear some lecturing or yelling but (tip from me) make your decision matter-of-fact. Be 110% sure this is what's best for you and tell them that, let them know that this IS an important decision and that you didn't make it lightly. that it's what is best for YOU.(i wish i could underline the YOU). You don't need lengthy explanations for them, just what you decided and that is is the right decision for you right now. The more sure you are about your choice, it will show through to them. give them time, and don't waiver on your decision. (and they will give you "scenario's" of what they think you're life will be like without school, my favorite..."and what do you plan to do with the rest of your life? work at burger king or some strip joint? you'll probably end up doing drugs..."
ok, bad quote but that's reality, i had to laugh cuz some ff managers make 30-60k a year!-but this is not the time to correct them...

ok, i realize i went off on some wild babbling rampage, sorry bout that but i've been standing not so far from where you are and i truly sympathize with you.

Just know we are here for you, and you T may beable to help you with some of the things you are feeling right now. Please take care of yourself.
i think i'll make chocolate cupcakes tonight...i'll make one just for you Angela girl ok? do you like sprinkles? i'll put extra on just for you ok?

Be good to yourself (((Angela))).
B2c.

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 6, 2004, at 8:04:15

In reply to Re: feeling low Jai Narayan, posted by B2chica on August 5, 2004, at 19:13:40

I hate waking up terrified and alone. It's nice when someone is there to hug. I guess I wonder about the energy and horror of Hiroshima and Nagaski. One of my dreams was of destruction and fire.
I know at this time every year I am upset by what we (USA) did in Japan.
That might have gotten into my dreams.
There are the more current wars: Iraq and Afganistan. I hear violent stories about the war almost every morning on the radio when I wake up. That's got to make an impression.
Last night I was nightmare free.
Good luck and lets keep in touch about this topic.
Jai Narayan

 

Re: feeling low Jai Narayan

Posted by B2chica on August 6, 2004, at 9:13:32

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Jai Narayan on August 6, 2004, at 8:04:15

Hey Jai!

i know this may sound a little cold, but i've sort of trained myself to step back with "history" like this...the emotion of it sucks me in and it twists my gut so much that i had to learn to remove to third party (sort of like stepping out of body to look down) otherwise i can't function...cuz it's not just that, there are everyday terrors that occurs in countries this very day. i have to block myself from that emotional torture.
But it is Very possible these issues invade your dreams.
And i still can't listen to news. i posted on social cuz i started to feel a bit like a freak but i can't even stand in the same room when the news is on TV, some suggested radio and one day it worked but the next it didn't. So i wake up to this annoying buzzing and then turn my CD's on to get ready.I know i'm in a way keeping out of touch with the real world but i know that it's not something i can deal with right now. i am just way to hypersensitive to any of that.

Congrats on the nightmare free sleep! man, doesn't it feel good. it just seems so strange to say that but people who don't experience constant night interruptions just don't know.
It's even starting to affect my husbands sleep, i was telling him that the other night i had 4 in a row, he said "Ya i know, you were mumbling in your sleep and your head was moving back and forth" (he's afraid i'm going to smack him in my sleep one of these times) i told him not to worry that i can't normally move that much.
But i have a question for you...if my hubby see's me having a nightmare would you suggest he wake me up or would it be better not to?? i heard that sometimes interrupted nightmares could traumatize you?? true or false??
B2c.

>>Last night I was nightmare free.
> Good luck and lets keep in touch about this topic.


 

Re: feeling low-(((((Angela2)))))

Posted by B2chica on August 6, 2004, at 12:27:19

In reply to Re: feeling low Angela2, posted by B2chica on August 5, 2004, at 19:50:42

Hi honey, how are you doing today?
well just wanted to write and let you know i made them cupcakes last night. chocolate fudge with chocolate frosting and made two special cupcakes, one for me and one just for you, i put two kinds of sprinkles on it for you, some yellow sugar-sprinkle stuff on it and those multicolor sprinkle balls on it too!! you like??
i made mine with orange sugarsprinkles and some multicolored ones as well.
B2c.

 

Re: feeling low B2chica

Posted by Angela2 on August 6, 2004, at 14:39:47

In reply to Re: feeling low Angela2, posted by B2chica on August 5, 2004, at 19:50:42

B2Chica, I absolutely like sprinkles and chocolate cupcakes are my favorite...*takes bite* yum...
You are a saint B2, I'm so glad we found eachother. Update since last time I posted: I talked to my mom, my brother and my aunt about this and I (emphasis on I) decided to stay in school. I figured out what made me so undecided about school yesterday and that is that I felt like people (my t and my mom) are making decisions for me. But I don't really think its like that NOW. (though it was in the past...) I feel alright going to school. I've got the jitters a little about it but I seriously think I'm going to be ok. So I think I'm going to school. And if I start feeling like I did last year, I will take some time off. If all my support dies off and things get to be too painful, I will get out.
Have a good day! And I will be here if you ever want to talk about anything again.

Angela

 

Re: feeling low Jai Narayan

Posted by Angela2 on August 6, 2004, at 14:46:51

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Jai Narayan on August 5, 2004, at 16:57:17

Hi Jai
I don't usually have bad dreams but sometimes before I fall asleep I get visions of Leatherface from texas Chainsaw Massacre and I have to sleep with my light on. It doesn't bother be though because no other movie has scared me like this since poltergeist when I was 7, and I think its cool. Its more exciting than anything else.

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 6, 2004, at 16:07:11

In reply to Re: feeling low Jai Narayan, posted by B2chica on August 6, 2004, at 9:13:32

Wow, I am really understanding your need for a break on the news.
I think it's wonderful that you are taking care of yourself.
I would like to pull away from all the news but I just want to hear the local stuff.
About being awakened by a mate during a nightmare....I really don't know if that's a good thing or it would be harmful???
Sorry.
I sleep in my own room. My mate sleeps in the next bedroom. We both have sleep issues.
It actually works out all right.
Thanks for your response.

 

Re: feeling low Angela2

Posted by B2chica on August 6, 2004, at 16:08:10

In reply to Re: feeling low B2chica, posted by Angela2 on August 6, 2004, at 14:39:47

Glad you enjoyed the cupcake! i thought they turned out pretty well, somehow i ended up with extra frosting so they all got a double dose -well ours did anyway ;^)

>>You are a saint B2,
-ROTFLMAO!!!! i think that's the first time i've heard that! i'm normally a big pain in the ***. it's a gift i think...yes...a gift.(troublesome like smirk here)

>>I (emphasis on I) decided to stay in school.

GOOD for you, and that's for the "emphasis on I" part. i'm proud of you...you should be too Angela dear. You did a good job of deciphering what was wrong and still being able to separate what was truly your decision.
Sounds like you've got a great plan. I just registered for my final class today. I'm a little nervous too, but like you said, if we start going down, we know what to do...one incomplete won't harm us...only delay us a bit.

Congrats. you sound Very strong.
Take Care You.
B2c.

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 6, 2004, at 16:13:20

In reply to Re: feeling low Jai Narayan, posted by Angela2 on August 6, 2004, at 14:46:51

boy scary movies are hard sometimes when the fear factor is up. I have recalled movies that really scared me when I am most vulnerable....not a good time to think about a scary bedroom scene. I really don't understand how the mind works.
I never saw that movie "Chainsaw Massacre" but I am sure it would be right there in the night when I was really afraid and alone.
Fear is so palpable.
My fear and dreams have changed since I started doing EMDR.
But my last dream seemed like a throw back to old times.
This is such an interesting topic I am having a hard time stopping.
talk to you soon?

 

Re: feeling low Jai Narayan

Posted by Angela2 on August 6, 2004, at 16:37:13

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Jai Narayan on August 6, 2004, at 16:13:20

With me, there's nothing really scary about dreams/ sleep. Its more the waking life that is tumultuous and stressful

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Angela2 on August 7, 2004, at 23:23:32

In reply to Re: feeling low Jai Narayan, posted by Angela2 on August 6, 2004, at 16:37:13

Sweet jai,
I am sorry I didn't use more sensitive words in my post about your bad dreams. I was just wrapped up in my own post. I just read your poem in babble writing and I reread some of what you wrote in this thread. Honestly, I didn't really pay attention to your posts so I had no clue what you had written. I really didn't know what you were saying. Because if I had I would have been more sympathetic. My brother is in Afghanistan right now and its so weird becuase its not even hitting me yet but my parents are definitely worried about him.

 

The above post is for you, Jai (nm)

Posted by Angela2 on August 8, 2004, at 17:26:11

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Angela2 on August 7, 2004, at 23:23:32

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 8, 2004, at 21:05:56

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Angela2 on August 7, 2004, at 23:23:32

Angela2, Thank you so much. What a sweet post.
I would agree with your post that waking life can be much harder. Lately things have gotten out of control for me.

I am so sorry your brother is in Afghanistan right now. That is probably really hard. I can't even imagine how you must feel.
I hate that we ( the USA) are putting young people in harms way. Every morning I wake up to a death toll. Reminds me of Viet Nam.


I am touched you read my old posts. I guess sometimes I feel invisible on PB. It's funny cuz it's so public.
So please know that I appreciate your post.

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Angela2 on August 8, 2004, at 21:38:49

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Jai Narayan on August 8, 2004, at 21:05:56

Jai,

Posting can be weird sometimes becuase it seems like there are certain reasons why people post: to rant about life, to reach out, to show support. I know people on this site are friends but I have not really had any friends on this site yet. For the longest time I just came here to get a sense that I was not alone in my troubles. I've only just begun to realize that there are actually people I care about and who care about me and see eachother as friends.

As for my brother, my family and some of our friends send him things he via mail. He can't use his cell phone from there so he rarely ever calls. But he called last night and he said that he sleeps on a cot that leaks, and he works 7 days a week but can't tell anyone what even immediate family what kind of work he does.

ttyl.

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 9, 2004, at 21:47:37

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Angela2 on August 8, 2004, at 21:38:49

That sounds so intense. How are you holding up under the stress?
Of course my mind thinks...How does he sleep? On a cot?
I have such a hard time sleeping in my plush bed.
Wow, I guess life is what we make of it.

You are a sweetie to take note that I am here and caring.
I am a real person with a real life.
I do care.
Remember that okay?

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by starlight on August 10, 2004, at 11:15:11

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by Jai Narayan on August 5, 2004, at 16:57:17

You know, fire is not a bad thing to experience in a dream, neither is destruction, even a loss of self control. All of those things point to a growth. In order to move forward we have to accept and release the past. Those dream images point to your subconcious doing just that. In order for something new and beautiful to arise we must often destroy that which holds us back. Dreams represent the subconcious knowledge of that and they're trying to communicate with the concious self that has yet to recognize that.

Instead of being scared of it, celebrate it, love it, embrace it. Embrace all parts of yourself and give thank to the parts of you which you believe keep you from moving forward. Try to love them and acknowledge that they are there for a reason. When you do that, you will most likely acheive some release. Best of luck....
starlight

 

Re: feeling low

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 11, 2004, at 22:04:12

In reply to Re: feeling low, posted by starlight on August 10, 2004, at 11:15:11

What an upbeat way of looking at my nightmares.
I love the positive spin on my fear thing.
You are a sweetie to give me the gift of your good thinking.
I will look at it that way.
I promise.
thanks


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