Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 432

Shown: posts 1 to 14 of 14. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Is anyone familiar with....

Posted by judy1 on June 25, 2002, at 23:42:10

"The National Trauma Center for Trauma Stabilization and Resolution"? It is located at Del Amo Hosp in LA area and is a 14 day inpatient program. Despite numerous hospitalizations, I have never voluntarily entered a program- so if anyone has knowledge to share I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks-judy

 

Re: Is anyone familiar with.... judy1

Posted by Phil on June 26, 2002, at 6:23:46

In reply to Is anyone familiar with...., posted by judy1 on June 25, 2002, at 23:42:10

http://www.delamohospital.com/index.html

You have probably seen this but just in case....

 

depends on the purpose judy1

Posted by terra miller on June 26, 2002, at 15:14:40

In reply to Is anyone familiar with...., posted by judy1 on June 25, 2002, at 23:42:10

Hi. I think it depends on your purpose/what you are looking for in the hospitalization. With this hospital, if you are looking for help managing selfcare issues and need stabilization, then this looks like a good place.

From what I've read, I have reservations on their approach to treatment of dissociative disorders, but I have no first hand experience nor have I heard anybody else's experiences from there.

So I would ask yourself what you are looking for, and then ask the people at the hospital if they can provide that.

In the trauma dept, I've never been under the care of Colin Ross, but I do not like his books or approach because I do not think it is realistic to think one can heal without having to reexperience at least some of that which has caused the pain in the first place. However, that doesn't mean that docs/therapist working under his model aren't good. It's just my opinion.

Some hosps. focus on stabilization, which is what it seems this hospital describes as their purpose. Other hosps. help you process through things. So it depends.

So, all that is to say, it depends on what you are looking for. Was that at all helpful?? :-)

While I'm at it......

If what you are looking for is stabilization and skills to cope, then I think this looks like a good place. You have to learn them somewhere. Everything I've learned I've been taught/told by others. Some I have read about in a book, but most practical advice has come from real people. I think real people help you cope the best. And if you choose to use real people in a hospital, then good for you. They'll have what you need for coping as well. The idea is to cope and eventually to get to the place where you can cope fairly well on your own, after a time. But you've got to be taught how first.

That might not have been anything that you were asking. Blow it off if it has no relevance. :-)

terra

 

Re: Is anyone familiar with.... Phil

Posted by judy1 on June 26, 2002, at 18:14:35

In reply to Re: Is anyone familiar with.... judy1, posted by Phil on June 26, 2002, at 6:23:46

Well duh- no I didn't find that site Phil, thank you so much. I did call for literature- but I will look through the site closely. Thank you!- judy

 

Actually Terra....

Posted by judy1 on June 26, 2002, at 18:23:50

In reply to depends on the purpose judy1, posted by terra miller on June 26, 2002, at 15:14:40

Coping is very relevant at this point. I saw my therapist this morning and thankfully I'm no longer in a crisis (I was in the ER Sunday). She felt that being exposed to groups that discussed their own traumatic experiences would trigger me and I tend to agree. So we are looking at cognitive groups for dissociation that emphasize coping skills. One interesting fact- she is getting an aide dog for a patient who dissociates a great deal, similar to me. I already have 2 dogs- one who could probably be trained for this purpose. Are you familiar with any of this? Hope you are doing well- judy

 

Re: Actually... judy1

Posted by terra miller on June 27, 2002, at 23:15:49

In reply to Actually Terra...., posted by judy1 on June 26, 2002, at 18:23:50

> Coping is very relevant at this point.

I didn't want to assume anything.

>I saw my therapist this morning and thankfully I'm no longer in a crisis (I was in the ER Sunday).

I'm so sorry it's so hard right now. I'm glad you're out of crisis.

>She felt that being exposed to groups that discussed their own traumatic experiences would trigger me and I tend to agree. So we are looking at cognitive groups for dissociation that emphasize coping skills.

Good. You really have to get stable before exposing yourself to too much. I still trigger very easily, but not quite as much as I used to. But in the beginning, I was a mess. And we spent lots of time on building trust and safety.

>One interesting fact- she is getting an aide dog for a patient who dissociates a great deal, similar to me. I already have 2 dogs- one who could probably be trained for this purpose.

I actually met one woman in a DID group that I thought about joining (I lasted one meeting!)... it was too soon for me. But, she had one of those dogs and it was just marvelous!

terra

 

Re: Going into the hospital. judy1

Posted by ShelliR on June 28, 2002, at 20:40:27

In reply to Actually Terra...., posted by judy1 on June 26, 2002, at 18:23:50

Hi Judy,

I've been reading your posts, but because I've been so depressed and not dissociative, I have not been able to offer anything. I admire how brave you are being and how hard you are trying. You too Terra. Both of you are not running from your "diagnosises".

DID is supposed to be a very "curable" disorder.
Dissociation *is* something which will go away after it is worked with, worked on slowly if possible.

I've gone into a hospital for disociative disorder and found it pretty safe and useful. Much different from the hellish places I've been in for my depression. Only once though it helped my dissociative disorder; the next time I felt the hospital had given up much of their program (because of insurance), and it was no longer helpful to me. It was too short for people who had just learned about the disorder. It was better for people who had one specific personality to work with that they felt was too dangerous to work on outside the hospital.

I don't know how much you can accomplish in two weeks. The first time I was there, it was for six weeks. Now because of insurance their program is only about two weeks--nothing definite.


I had heard of this hospital from other patients--positive stuff, and they gave me alot of advise, like who I should try to get as a therapist etc. Many hospitals don't offer individual therapy and I found this very useful to sort out what was happening in groups. But only 3x a week and they cut it from an hour to 1/2 hour.

Can you talk to former patients or does your therapist personally know this hospital? I wouldn't believe the literature because so many programs exaggerate. Or the other hand it seems like right now you absolutely need to learn not to dissociate.

How are trained dogs helpful? I've never heard of that. Also do you dissociate when you are with your baby?

Shelli

 

Thank you Shelli

Posted by judy1 on June 29, 2002, at 1:23:37

In reply to Re: Going into the hospital. judy1, posted by ShelliR on June 28, 2002, at 20:40:27

I really appreciate your post and I'm sorry you've been depressed- are you feeling better at all? Are you referring to Del Amo when you speak about the hospital, or a different one. I got the package today, you were right about the literature (it had a beautiful beach photo on the cover). The 14 day program looks very intense, from 8a to 9p M-Sunday, with group therapy daily (it said 1 hr), individual therapy 4x/week for an hour, art therapy, 'homework', etc. To me it sounded like a great deal of work, so when you said 6 weeks I think I would feel overwhelmed- or maybe you need that much time to get the full effect of the program. I was going to post Terra and ask why she doesn't like the shrink who runs it, I think he doesn't believe in working with specific memories- which is appealing to me because I find that terrifying. I know he is prominent and speaks across the country. My therapist is familiar with this hospital and my shrink knows someone we both respect who is very positive about it. I am not in a crisis anymore, so I have time to work more with my therapist; sometimes people aren't ready for programs like this, and spending more time with her has helped. There is one thing that really bothers me and I was curious if this sounds familiar to you- I just hate the feeling of being a burden on my drs., I believe they care but I worry about being dependent- perhaps it just has to do with fear of rejection.
The dogs are there to help keep you grounded; I've discovered in the 20+ car accidents I have had, they have all occured while I was alone in the car. I do not dissociate with my children or my animals, so my therapist was hoping to have my dog with me always- in the car, stores, etc.- just like a regular aide dog. They've just started doing this and apparently it's pretty successful. I do dissociate with other people, quite often during therapy and after I leave. I usually try to walk around after a session, but have lost several hours on more than one occasion.
Again thank you so much for your input and I hope you begin to feel better-Take care, judy

 

Hi Terra, a question?

Posted by judy1 on June 29, 2002, at 1:36:11

In reply to depends on the purpose judy1, posted by terra miller on June 26, 2002, at 15:14:40

"In the trauma dept, I've never been under the care of Colin Ross, but I do not like his books or approach because I do not think it is realistic to think one can heal without having to reexperience at least some of that which has caused the pain in the first place. However, that doesn't mean that docs/therapist working under his model aren't good. It's just my opinion."

I mentioned to Shelli that this approach was appealing to me because of the complete fear I would feel. My shrink who has treated vets with PTSD believes in dealing directly with the cause of trauma, my therapist has views similar to Dr. Ross. (Or she may be telling me that so I'm not afraid of her bringing up something). I've read that many memories (especially those of children) may not be totally accurate, but that doesn't really matter. I don't know if I have 'memories' anyway, I do experience flashbacks when triggered, they are confusing but I accept my therapist's interpretation because of things my family has said. Do you find dealing directly with your traumatic experience(s) helpful in your recovery? How do you find the courage to do so? Thank you so much, and again don't feel you need to answer. take care, judy

 

Re: Thank you Shelli judy1

Posted by ShelliR on June 29, 2002, at 14:11:38

In reply to Thank you Shelli, posted by judy1 on June 29, 2002, at 1:23:37

Hi Judy,

No I wasn't in that hospital. And I am feeling better, thanks.

I am worried about the intensity of the program you are thinking about. I think therapy has to go slowly and it scares me abit how intense that program is and whether you will get overwhelmed.


I think for a while (in my really really humble opinion) that you might need to focus just on controlling the dissociation rather than on memories. Maybe because the director doesn't feel like you have to go through the memories, it really might focus on how to get through this, and not focus on specifics. And then you will be able to focus more on the memories, a bit later in your therapy, outside the program. I'd find out more about the program.

Meanwhile, the dog is such a great idea. If you can be either with the kids or with the dog (or both), maybe you can avoid so many crises.

Terra, did you work on memories right away when you realized your diagnosis? Of course everyone is different as is every therapy.


Shelli

 

Re: Hi Terra, a question? judy1

Posted by terra miller on June 29, 2002, at 14:13:45

In reply to Hi Terra, a question?, posted by judy1 on June 29, 2002, at 1:36:11

> I mentioned to Shelli that this approach was appealing to me because of the complete fear I would feel.

I think it is those fears that you have to stare down at some point. But I think you have to be stable to do it, and feel that you have support. For me it was a choice. I willfully made a choice to face whatever fear I was hit with, and I chose to talk about it and to T-E-L-L my therapist all that I was feeling and remembering. Sometimes I never got out a word, but through actions and responses somewhat similar to charades I was able to get the point across. But for me it was very willful. And for support I had a list of who I was to call and when, how to stay grounded, what to do if I was panicking, and which hospital to go to if everything else failed. I also had two internet support groups that supported me in chat and on boards. So I chose to face the beast and stare it down. That's what's made me strong. Three years ago, I couldn't post a thing because I was so afraid my abusers would find me and hunt me down. Now I'm more apt to want to punch them in the nose (and _then_ run! <giggle>)

>My shrink who has treated vets with PTSD believes in dealing directly with the cause of trauma

I do too. See above about "you have to face it" to conquer it. You also have to face it to assimilate it. I think of it this way: either I face it, or I spend the rest of my life with flashbacks suggesting that I need to face something. When I face something, the panic leaves me completely. That's pretty valuable. I now embrace the flashbacks and say thankyou for them. To me, I have no idea what's shut up in my head and the only way I know is by a flashback. If I pay attention, I can learn a lot from them.

>my therapist has views similar to Dr. Ross. (Or she may be telling me that so I'm not afraid of her bringing up something). I've read that many memories (especially those of children) may not be totally accurate, but that doesn't really matter.

I think it doesn't matter. Many people say memories aren't 100% accurate. But I think if you dwell on that too long, you can psych yourself out when what is most important is to believe in yourself. That sounds so goooshy, and I don't mean that at all. But I think most people have got it at least 80% right. (a figure that I am only pulling out of the air for descriptive purposes only.) I think dwelling too long on the accuracies of memories places doubt you don't need in your healing as well as provides another form of denial that just stalls the healing process. It's best to let it happen without intellectualizing it too much. (Said from the "Queen" of rationalization!)


>I don't know if I have 'memories' anyway, I do experience flashbacks when triggered

The flashbacks always come first. You don't get the memories until later. Usually you get the flashbacks, which totally freak you out. And then you do all that you can to numb them out and push them out of your head. I did that for almost a solid year. (And I was h-ll to live with and drank almost every night I could.) Sometimes you can do that. Sometimes you can do that for years. But if you are curious enough, you might find that there's additional information that comes up. It's much like a puzzle. You might get a memory picture of a kite, for example. What in the world does a kite have to do with anything at all? You may never know, until later you remember that it's part of a wallpaper pattern in a room, or you flew a kite with someone when you were a kid, or who knows (it's not usually as simple as the obvious flying of the kite; it's more often more like the wallpaper example.)


>They are confusing but I accept my therapist's interpretation because of things my family has said. Do you find dealing directly with your traumatic experience(s) helpful in your recovery?

Absolutely. I always feel lighter, like a weight is lifted from me. And I feel stronger each time I face something.


>How do you find the courage to do so?

Some people are motivated by anger. Sometimes it's anger in the form of... I'm so mad that my life is being messed up by this flashback. (Instead of seeing the flashback as useful) Usually it's determination because I know it's the best thing to do, but I usually feel like I am going to pee my pants and I often call ahead to my therapist to tell him to have an empty wastebasket in case I puke- haven't yet- and he knows that we're going to work hard that session.)

~terra

 

thank you Shelli and terra..

Posted by judy1 on June 29, 2002, at 20:51:10

In reply to Re: Hi Terra, a question? judy1, posted by terra miller on June 29, 2002, at 14:13:45

You both gave me much to think about.

My unhealthy move of the day:
I dissociated, fell down some steps and just came back from urgent care with the news of a torn ACL in my right knee. I seem to have quite the repetoire of self-injury skills. So, since I am relatively immobile, that solves the hospital decision. What is frightening is the thought that i did it deliberately. Not looking for sympathy, just bewildered. Take care, judy

 

terra....

Posted by judy1 on June 29, 2002, at 20:55:38

In reply to Re: Hi Terra, a question? judy1, posted by terra miller on June 29, 2002, at 14:13:45

The flashbacks always come first. You don't get the memories until later. Usually you get the flashbacks, which
totally freak you out. And then you do all that you can to numb them out and push them out of your head. I did
that for almost a solid year. (And I was h-ll to live with and drank almost every night I could.) Sometimes you can
do that. Sometimes you can do that for years. But if you are curious enough, you might find that there's additional
information that comes up. It's much like a puzzle. You might get a memory picture of a kite, for example. What in
the world does a kite have to do with anything at all? You may never know, until later you remember that it's part
of a wallpaper pattern in a room, or you flew a kite with someone when you were a kid, or who knows (it's not
usually as simple as the obvious flying of the kite; it's more often more like the wallpaper example.)


-I honestly didn't know that, thank you. I probably should pay more attention to what's in the flashbacks, the problem is I am at the stage you wrote about where I do everything to push them away. take care, judy

 

Re: flashbacks judy1

Posted by terra miller on June 29, 2002, at 22:00:14

In reply to terra...., posted by judy1 on June 29, 2002, at 20:55:38

don't feel too bad. i'm at that stage (again) right now, too. i know that i am having flashbacks, but they last what seems like milliseconds before they go back down again. i'm barely aware enough to notice that i'm flashing/triggering. (which is one step ahead of having no idea why i am irritable... at least i know i'm irritable from flashing.)

i think that right now i am really functioning high because i have lots of stress going on. as a result, everything is tight and surviving marvelously like a well oiled machine. so, i don't remember much even though i know stuff is still coming up. once the stress lessens, then inside things will loosen up a bit and i will be less on guard and then more can come up and out for longer durations so that i can have the time to look at it and learn from it. as it is right now, i think my insides know that i don't have time to deal with new memories, so they are being kept from me. soon i will have less stress to deal with, and i will be allowed to process more memories..... and you'll know because i'll post something like: AHHHHHHHHHHH, IT HURTS. or something to that degree.


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