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Re: goals

Posted by alexandra_k on May 11, 2021, at 9:32:50

In reply to Re: goals, posted by alexandra_k on May 11, 2021, at 9:21:18

and the point is to teach me that it's all about hoops.

you jump through the hoops: and you get paid.

and it's all about jumping through the hoops. so that you get paid.

and employment is like that / about that, too. jumping through the hoops and getting paid.

i'm sure the chief executive managers of the administration head honchos of the managerial administration mighty gods jump through all the hoops when they ensure their job is not done. not done by them. mostly in order to prevent their job from being done by anyone.

the ombudsman... whose job appears to be to ensure there are no unannounced inspections. and whatever inspections that are done he never writes up properly all the crimes against humanity that he sees. the repeated insistance on refusing to comply with human rights.

on my health file notes there is a note in the corner. know what it says: 'use of force'. it is written on my file notes, there, like a prescription.

it appears to mean that if i present to the health system then they beleive they are justified. entitled. to use force against me. that's why in my last admission they were keen to get 'psychiatry' (so called, in name only) out to sign papers to have me involuntarily detained against my will. why they were so keen to make a big production of stationing guards outside my seclusion cell to physically force me to stay there (in violation of my right to see a lawyer or phone police to inform them i was being involuntarily detained) etc... why they beleive they are entitled.

they believe they are entitled
they believe they are entitled
they believe they are entitled

i have a couple nieces who work in the hospital. various aspects of care. they say:

the system is abusive.

by which they seem to mean... they were abused during their training there. they were abused by other staff. they were required to abuse patients.

to get paid. y'know?

they pay them
they pay them
they pay them
they pay them
they pay them

they will only abuse me.

i don't want to join them.

despite them.

not because of them.

i am losing my desire to help people.

i suppose that is the point.

they want to knock that out of me.

see see see see see see see you are an abuser of people just like me
see see see see see?

they pay tehm
they pay them
they pay them
they pay them
they pay them

the government pays them

the government chooses them

to train them
to pay them

to abuse others

to be paid to ensure their job is not done
is not done by them
is not done by anyone.

where is my money, new zealand?

they are taking the qualifications they gave me back

some kind of lesson

some kind of lesson to me...

that the entire thing is meaningless.

the only thing that matters..

is they pay tehm they pay them they pay them they pay them they pay them they pay them they pay them

the younger they are... the closer the memory of being a completely helpless infant in the face of a world that requires them to have their big big big eyes and do everything they can to... invoke... awwwww caretaking behavior. because it doesn't matter how much you pay someone to do a job of looking after... it doesn't matter. the frontal lobe portion of the brain and it's connection to higher things no work-y. the younger they are and the more... aware they are that they are powerless in the face of people with all the power... people who they pay. they pay them they pay them they pay them they pay them they pay them. and you huddle in with a herd of others and you keep your head down and there's progression for the herd until you grow up into one of them.


is how the money goes around.


how it doesn't.

how new zealand falls further and further and further and further and further and further behind.




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