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Re: therapist saying 'more effective' to go elsewhere

Posted by alexandra_k on December 18, 2018, at 17:31:11

In reply to Re: therapist saying 'more effective' to go elsewhere, posted by alexandra_k on December 18, 2018, at 17:26:02

i meant that a therapist with very strict / small / or tight boundaries would work to process how you interpret or what you feel rather than taking a stand on your interpretation or feeling as correct or incorrect or justified or unwarranted. they would be seeking to discover patterns in the way you tend to habitually respond to things so as to try and get at what is driving some of those patterns / responses.

that way of doing therapy can feel aimless while the therapist gets to know you, however. it can also feel invalidating / unsupportive for people who want help in deciding which things are justifed vs which things need backing down on etc.

it sounds like you sought out more of the latter -- but that does make things a bit harder... messier... with respect to boundaries and so on. i don't think your therapist has necessarily shown bad boundaries... just broader, wider, more encompassing boundaries... things get messy...

i prefer the former sort of traditional thing... but many don't.

but you should be able to still vent to her about how you feel and how angry you are and so on. and your therapist should be able to help you process your anger and so on... without committing to her daughter being the bad guy or without taking sides.

do you have siblings? how do y'all get along?




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