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Re: It's really over and miss my t so much :-( healingmysoul

Posted by Dinah on August 15, 2010, at 12:02:05

In reply to It's really over and miss my t so much :-(, posted by healingmysoul on August 13, 2010, at 20:39:50

I always regret it when I try to communicate my feelings through termination, even though I mean it at the time. Of course, I rarely really mean it, precisely. I mean something more like "If you don't care then it's really stupid of me to come and see you." And what I want is "Of course I care." But... life and reality being what it is, what I get is "So this will be your last appointment?"

Sometimes a bit more, but really what can they do? If they beg you to stay, they're likely violating all sorts of principles. Therapists aren't supposed to try to keep clients in therapy against their will, or keep clients dependent on them.

I've done something similar just recently. And while it felt at that moment that I had no choice, because he just wasn't hearing what I was trying to say, I realized later that it really wasn't the best method of communication either. And chances were, he wasn't going to hear what I was trying to say if I did that either.

Do you really wish to terminate? Or do you feel there are no alternatives to express your feelings to him? Or something else? Is it still in your control? Do you think he'd be open to continuing the conversation? Or was his termination letter in reply a permanent decision?




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