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Re: Is there life after psychoanalysis? (trigger)

Posted by violette on July 13, 2010, at 17:44:09

In reply to Re: Is there life after psychoanalysis? (trigger), posted by ralphrost2 on July 13, 2010, at 14:07:21

Well maybe her cynicism was to remind you of your rationalization defense?...though I don't fully understand about being skeptic or less than positive about it in some way-if it was a sign you were feeling better..

Rationalization has been a huge defense for me, and one of the few I have left, so I totally understand. But it's not as bad as some of the others so I still use it, but T doesn't really let me do it in the therapy room. Repressed dreams as well, don't remember ever having nightmares as a child.

As for ADs-yes, they screwed me up in some ways. I did need them at one point, but later was always prescribed them for anxiety so I did not appreciate having to deal with the side effects of taking them daily. It was a merry-go-round-either have no sex drive, gain weight, and feel tired and cognitively and emotionally dull or deal with anxiety. I also feel they prolonged my illness...Thankfully my T lets me take ativan or xanax and I haven't ran into tolerance problems.

I noticed my brain is getting more balanced with the intellect vs emotion, though I still go overboard w/one or the other at times. I think the more you work on this, Ralph, the more you'll adjust naturally, it takes time. Of course you don't want to let all your defenses go when working on tough issues--or it would be too overwhelming like you said, so I wouldn't worry too much about it right now as it is helping you cope with stuff that emerges from therapy. Hang in there :)

Btw-Having strong defenses may have once saved you from psychosis. My siblings, who seemed to not have dissociation or use rationalization as much both had total breakdowns. As an adult, the lower-level defenses wear you down and don't hold up...but hopefully you can recognize how your 'strong' defenses once served a good purpose while you deal with their loss...maybe try to celebrate them rather than mourn them so much, perhaps, while you slowly adapt with new, healthier defenses with the help of your T.

Take care!




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