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Re: 'You're Harmful!' Dinah

Posted by Verloren on July 2, 2010, at 5:55:39

In reply to Re: 'You're Harmful!' Verloren, posted by Dinah on July 1, 2010, at 13:35:19

I'll have to work on the compromise. I don't want to yield from what I believe I need right now.

I'm getting a bit angry at the situation though and therefore my mind is foggier.

I did ask her last night if I had been doing anything to make her uncomfortable. She said, no that she had been becoming more comfortable as I have been opening up and trusting more as well. It's progress! At last! I can finally Talk to my therapist.

I will mention the red flags and how to recognize them myself first. I like your suggestion of beating her to the punch in a way.

I should also mention that the first time we Ever discussed our boundaries was when I came in a few weeks ago with a list of boundaries and behaviors and said to her "let's talk about your boundaries so I know what to expect" and we went through the whole list discussing the different topics of what was and was Not appropriate for our relationship.
I guess that's why I took it so hard. Because I had to bring up boundaries with her in the first place or who knows when she would have talked about them. (wait til they became an issue?) so I know what is expected. I Don't need to be told. I brought it up to avoid being able to push one and say "well I didn't know better".

-v

 

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poster:Verloren thread:952821
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20100529/msgs/952935.html