Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

Re: Intelligence and bonding in childhood abuse cases BabyToes

Posted by fleeting flutterby on April 21, 2010, at 16:56:09

In reply to Intelligence and bonding in childhood abuse cases, posted by BabyToes on April 21, 2010, at 14:23:34

I think your post makes a lot of sense. The child that can "out wit" the abuse is more likely to come out of it less damaged. With that said-- I also think it has A LOT to do with the child having a "bond" with a SAFE adult. Like you talked about your grandmother and a few teachers. I think that can give the child hope and a connection to the "healthy" way relationships can be.
I wonder if your poor dear brother didn't have that kind of adult-bond??

I grew up with abuse/neglect and experienced life threatening trauma...have been diagnosed with complex PTSD and many other things. I have chosen a partner much like the relationships I grew up with (abusive/neglectful) and my children have been struggling as I lack in exhibiting mental health and healthy relationships. I haven't a single friend (IRL).
-- But-- I could easily get straight A's in school if I cared to-- and was in the top ten of my class every year.
I think for me and many that don't function to the level you do-- it's not so much the intelligence(I've been asked by every therapist I've seen why I'm not an addict, or homeless, due to the childhood I had-- I knew inside myself that such behavior would just make my life even worse than it already was)

the key difference, I'd venture to guess is, I hadn't a single adult in my childhood that took me under their wing.(grandparents deceased, abusive aunts) I was subject to some adults that added to the abuse/neglect even. I learned that humans aren't safe and pain will result.

I think you are very fortunate to have had the intelligence AND the bonding that was so important to make it out less damaged than so many others. I can imagine-- even still, it wasn't easy for you. My heart is with you.

take care





Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post

Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.


Start a new thread

Google www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for

This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:fleeting flutterby thread:944377