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Re: finally diagnosed with personality disorder

Posted by Garnet71 on August 20, 2009, at 9:48:30

In reply to Re: finally diagnosed with personality disorder Garnet71, posted by deerock on August 20, 2009, at 9:05:00


I'm sorry if I confused you at all - I don't know what your main issue is-disorders of self include other things, but often it is used to describe NPD and after reading your posts i always think it's NPD. NPD has a range that most people fall within. The most extreme/far right is antisocial; however, psychodynamic therapists won't treat antisocial, from what I've read. And the fact you are in a Ts office probably indicates you are not as bad off as others.....

Most people with NPD do not even enter a therapists office. Some researchers think a larger proportion of the population has NPD than what's indicated, and that many end up in government, teachers, etc.. Most people with NPD will not admit there is anything wrong with them. Those notions are commonly accepted.

Again, I'm not educated in this stuff, just have read a lot....However, I am 99% sure psychodynamic therapy several times a week is the best kind of therapy for NPD, if that is your issue, and I think the only type of therapy for that.

But most people have a mix of several PDs traits. Maybe your T doesn't ascribe you to one in particular and therefore CANT answer you directly? Either way, your T seems to be trying to remain sensitive to you while remaining honest--as in not lying saying oh, you have no major issues...I personally wouldn't want a T to "tell me what I want to hear". That would not be good for you; I think she's trying to do what's best for you. Many Ts will not give you diagnoses at all. That is not uncommon at all.

I hope you can think less about the label and more about getting better. But know people with NPD are known to hate that there may be something wrong with them and as I said before it's known many people with NPD will not even acknowledge there is something 'wrong' with them, even though there is something 'wrong' with all of us.

A psychodynamic therapist will, from the way I see it 1) identify the ways we cope/adapt/ defense mechanisms 2) unveil your core self 3) integrate all those adaptions with your core self to amalagate a true self 4) enable you to identify and know and become your true self 5) rebuild and help you shape your true self, revealing and using your own insights to help you change your negative coping mechanisms and relating to people (NPD) to positive coping mechanisms and ways of relating to people.

The relationship with the T is key. The relationship is the tool to helping you do this. Your progress and ability to do this is based upon your relationship with T--how you interact with her. She is like a psuedo-parent who allows you to complete 1) through 5).

We develop our unhealthy coping mechanisms from our relationships with our parents; you can learn to change your coping mechanisms through the relationship with T.

I should not post about this anymore because I think I'm making things worse for you. Deerock-PD traits are just ways we adapt to cope-they do not define us as individuals. Most people have PD traits and I do too. We all have issues, distortions of self from things that happened to us when we grew up; things that shaped us. Please remember that!




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poster:Garnet71 thread:912904