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Re: nothing since my last post... TherapyGirl

Posted by peddidle on August 14, 2009, at 22:00:21

In reply to Re: nothing since my last post... peddidle, posted by TherapyGirl on August 14, 2009, at 19:33:57

> Yeah, I know what you mean. I'm going to be facing my own challenges there in a few months. I go back and forth on how much contact is enough and what tips over into torture.

***(((TherapyGirl)))

>
> What if you told her you really felt the need to keep in contact with her and asked her what she feels she could offer? I know you tried several things, but I can't remember if you gave her the opportunity to say what she is willing or able to do. I told my T last night that once/month is not enough contact the first few months after she retires -- I need some kind of transition. She asked how often and I said no more than 3 weeks between contacts, but some of it could be via email. So maybe come January that won't really work, but for now it feels like we were able to compromise in a way that keeps it from being quite so horrible for me.
>
> I wish I could help you do the same thing with your T.


**Thanks. I guess I didn't really give her an opportunity, per se (that's my passive-aggressiveness...), but she was pretty clear about what she wouldn't do. She did say I could still email her, but "it just won't be therapy...", and actually, when I talked to her that last time, before we hung up she said to email her. It's just, I didn't get a transition at all-- it went from the usual one, sometimes 2, session per week, which were usually supplemented with several emails, to 3 or 4 sessions per week plus multiple emails, then straight to zero. She KNOWS I have severe difficulty dealing with change, and at a time in my life when there are so many changes happening at once, the abrupt end just seems cruel. I know she's not intentionally trying to hurt me, but that's what's happening. To be fair, it's not like she never gave me an opportunity to discuss this stuff with her, quite the opposite, but, again, between my passive-aggressive nature, denial, and everything else, I just refused to get into it. I guess the harsh irony is that she told me she began preparing for the termination in the fall when she/we though I was finishing in December, so then she was ready for it in May. Nice, huh?

 

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