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Re: My Story? susan47

Posted by Racer on September 2, 2008, at 21:22:10

In reply to Re: My Story?, posted by susan47 on September 1, 2008, at 11:33:13

> But the point is how awful my therapist was, the point is how awful other therapists are when they do this to their clients. The point is, this has to be shown for what it is and it has to become Unacceptable Practice. And as long as this sort of thing is done by therapists to clients, how many people are walking around out there wounded by their own need, wounded by a profession that purports to help these very people?
> It's Bogus. It's Fake. It's Unreal. It's just not acceptable. It HAS TO STOP. IT HAPPENS TOO OFTEN.

Susan, I don't know how to put this thought into words, so please forgive me if I do it clumsily.

It sounds as thought you're doing something I used to do about my bad experience: you're making it more global, which prevents you from making it personal. I know that I do that to protect myself from the conflicts I have about having been so hurt. If I say, "this shouldn't be allowed to happen to anyone," I don't have all my standardized "...but I should have..." or "...but I'm not worth anything better, because I'm so bad..." routines, and I also have this deep internal fear that maybe I wasn't really hurt by it, but only think I was because I'm so damaged/selfish/lazy/whatever that I can't accept that everything they said was true, etc.

For me, it's a way to avoid the sorts of pain I felt in childhood, from hearing that I "shouldn't" have felt pain from the things done to me. Instead of hearing that "it wasn't so bad, you're blowing it out of proportion -- just like you always do, because you're so selfish/egocentric/whatever" because I'm saying *I* was hurt and *I* deserved better, I can globalize it, and include all that "...but it wasn't really that bad for me, it just could have been for someone more vulnerable."

I don't know if any of that made sense, and I don't know if any of it applies to you. I just thought I'd put that out there, and see if maybe it was helpful to someone else.




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