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Re: Identity disturbance rskontos

Posted by Quintal on August 26, 2008, at 17:38:59

In reply to Re: Identity disturbance Quintal, posted by rskontos on August 24, 2008, at 12:42:19

Hi rsk,

Thanks for the great post!

>I feel I was robbed of my identity in my childhood justing trying to survive.

Yup, do you think you were allowed to develop as a seperate peron? My mother said she viewed me as an extension of herself. I was in the supermarket a while ago listening to a mother asking her child which sweets it wanted "What would you like? How much do you want?" She was role playing, encouraging her child to make descisions for herself, learning to be an independent person. I was impressed because I don't think my mother really did that with me. I thought 'Wow, that's what was missing from my childhood. I didn't know parents were supposed to do that!'. I didn't have a choice of what I ate or what clothes I wore until I was 16. Children need that type of encouragement to grow into healthy people, and for whatever reasons I don't think we got what we needed.

>I wonder about why your T thinks an identity is so important for her to see.

I don't know. I think she was just probing for weaknesses, but maybe she thinks having a stronger sense of self would help me interact with other people more easily? One of the things she has been able to pin down is my social anxiety and social avoidance, so she's probably looking for solutions to that.

Thank you again.

Q


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