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Re: 2 questions--hope thats ok!!

Posted by Dinah on January 5, 2008, at 11:33:57

In reply to 2 questions--hope thats ok!!, posted by ladybugsmom on January 5, 2008, at 10:50:57

I sometimes see things in black and white. But all too often I get bogged down in a muddle of greys.

I don't think that affects the fact that I have rather ironclad boundaries. And I like it that way. I'm not sure changing that is a goal of mine.

I have an enormous fear of abandonment, although not with my husband. Not because I think he loves me too much to ever leave me, but because I know him too well to think that he'd be able to reconcile leaving me with his view of himself. I'm not sure my fear of abandonment is unjustified. People do leave and people do die. And in the end anytime I love, I'll be hurt. My therapist says that loving someone and having them leave years after for reasons not connected to me is not a reason to fear abandonment. But I disagree. I always have to figure whether the reward is worth the pain. And at any sign that that pain is at hand, I tend to grasp close or turn and walk away before I can be hurt.




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