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Re: I am so angry at life right now triggers

Posted by happyflower on November 19, 2007, at 1:21:08

In reply to Re: I am so angry at life right now triggers Happyflower, posted by Phillipa on November 18, 2007, at 20:10:08

Thanks Phillipa,

I looked her up, I remember the hearing about the 5 stages of grief. So that was helpful. This early morning I am just in tears. I think I was still in shock for most of the viewing, didn't cry at all nor did I feel like I had to. The funeral I was okay till the end. But still I still was feeling numb. But then anger, real anger too now. Now I am just sobbing my eyes out maybe for the first time for baby lia. But my brother's grief in there too. Plus my old T's , my FIL who died this year too. I have lost so many people I care about this year. I feel like I am grieving it all now at once and the feeling is so overwhelming. I just want the pain to stop in my life. Then add to it the people who are alive who hurt me, I just want to die. not really die, but hide away and never come out. I don't want to open my heart anymore. People are hurtful and the people who mean the most tome always seem to leave me. It is so hard, I just don't want it to happen anymore. I want to be left alone.
I see my T this morning, not sure if I really feel up to going. THere isn't anything he can do, I just have to go through this myself.




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