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Re: my former T :( :( :( LONG

Posted by Dory on November 14, 2007, at 15:21:19

In reply to my former T :( :( :( LONG, posted by Dory on November 12, 2007, at 14:56:32

i talked to my T about it and he was as baffled as i was. It isn't true that they aren't allowed to speak to clients outside.. it's a popular boundary. They aren't supposed to have social relationships, but sometimes even that is unavoidable. Think of small towns.. think of belonging to the same church or something. i ended up in the same meditation group as a counsellor i had once... there was only one group in town. Acknowledgement in public is a choice, and should be made together. T could have said he chooses not to and then i would not expected him to. Both former T and current T asked what i would want them to do. It was already agreed upon.

T said he could see possibly why he hadn't spoken or come up to me, but he could not understand why he didn't even at least look over and acknowledge my existence. He could have even smiled my way and i would have known he wasn't just ignoring me. T said that didn't make sense either.

i told T that no matter what.. i don't care if i am having tea with the queen, i would want him to say hi. He could do it in passing.. he wouldn't have to stop and chat if he felt it was inappropriate.

it totally made me feel like i didn't matter.. i didn't count. How could he? He knew how bad things were at the time.. didn't he at least wonder if they were better? did he not care one bit if i was ok?

i am calmer because i am depressed and it wins out. i have so much going on that this is just another helping on the plate now. It still makes me feel like trash. Disposable. Insignificant.




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