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Re: what's wrong with this guy? Dory

Posted by Dinah on November 6, 2007, at 8:45:28

In reply to what's wrong with this guy?, posted by Dory on November 6, 2007, at 8:30:44

Speaking from my experience only...

My therapist would say it's not his job to play me like a violin. That he might use what I told him to understand me, but he wouldn't use it to manipulate me. Not only because manipulating me isn't his job, but because using what I told him would in effect be allowing me control over what he does in relation to me. And he never ever allows that.

It would frustrate me no end, but he'd want me to understand my "keys" and see how what underlies them affects my life. He'd want me to see whether I'm pleased with the keying of my locks, so to speak, or if I want to make changes in how I react. He'd want me to have the control in a healthy way. He wouldn't want control over me.

And of course, he'd be there no matter what I did (within his fairly broad boundaries - no showing up at his door or anything).

If you don't mind my saying so, I hope for you what my own therapist would do. It's nice to know what defuses me. But it's even nicer to know what defuses me, or doesn't defuse me, and then decide on my own if I wish to be defused.




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