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Re: watching a triggering movie**trigger RealMe

Posted by B2chica on November 6, 2007, at 8:17:40

In reply to Re: watching a triggering movie**trigger B2chica, posted by RealMe on November 5, 2007, at 22:43:25

>>What scares me is sometimes I have had an urge to jump in front of the Metra train. Once I had to turn my back to the train as it rolled into the station, and I threw up.

oh man do i understand this...this urge is SO strong. and what scares me is i feel i'm gaining impulsivity. and that urge becomes an attempt.
sometimes i feel lucky that i don't live near a large bridge like in california or new york. cuz i'd go there and stand and stare and think. and one of the days with the impulse i'd do it. i'm sure id regret it, but i could never take it back.
that's why i refuse to own a gun. i have that urge many MANY times. but since i dont own one. i can't just quickly get, load and pull.
i have time to think, to change my mind. or time to call someone.




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