Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
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what to do when T doesn't know what to do?

Posted by sunnydays on November 2, 2007, at 20:18:52

Well.... he explained that that wasn't how he meant it. But he said, "sunnydays, I just don't know what else to suggest to you. You say the DBT stuff doesn't work for you, and none of my suggestions are potent enough to deal with this sadness you have." I freaked out that that meant he was frustrated with me and was going to leave me, and he explained that he was not going to leave, and he was just thinking out loud and should have been more conscious of the fact that that's one of my fears. He asked if he shouldn't say things like that.

I said, "Well, I don't know. I don't want you to get frustrated and leave right away and me not expect it." And he said, "I'm not going to leave right away, and I'm not going to leave slowly, sunnydays. I'm not going to leave. [pause] I'm not leaving. I don't get frustrated with you ever. If I do get frustrated, it's with myself, not ever with you." He explained he was just thinking that we needed to find some more resources for me that might help, but that he was absolutely not removing himself from the relationship.

But it scares me anyway. And I get so sad at nights, all related to this trauma stuff and I just get so overwhelmed and sad and anxious and memories and everything and don't know what to do. I've tried like every coping strategy I can think of.

I started crying really hard when it was time to leave because it never feels like enough time to say what I want to say, even though I go twice a week. After I calmed down a little he said, "That was a good cry. And you're coming back on Tuesday and I'll be here, and nothing's going to change about that. You're ok, sunnydays. You have people that care about you, and want to see you happy and feeling better. If you're sad, or scared, or angry, or happy, you're ok. You're ok." And somehow I managed to get out of the room.

I just feel so lost all the time it seems like. I hate trauma. Hate it.





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