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Re: **STRONG TRIGGER***(suicide thougts) B2chica

Posted by muffled on November 2, 2007, at 14:24:14

In reply to Re: **STRONG TRIGGER***(suicide thougts), posted by B2chica on November 2, 2007, at 13:54:32

> wanted to let ya know. my T just called me.

YAAYYYY!!! GOOD T!

> we talked for a bit i was trying hard to explain to her. i'm sure glad she 'gets' it.

YAAAYYY!!!! Good T!!...again!

> cuz i'm NOT suicidal...it just like i got some sick suicidal cheer squad that wont go away. (laugh??)

Hmmm LOL, I crossed posts and just announced that you were! OK I pull foot outta my mouth!

> but she also said i can call her on cell if i needed to this weekend. (that makes me feel a little more relaxed about things).

*Good T.......again again! I think its huge to know you can contact her, just remeber she SAID YOU COULD, so if you feel you need to, don't waffle, just CALL!

> she mentioned my going back on zyprexa...but d@mn people i still got baby weight and refuse to gain any more freaking weight. and i told her that i had hoped to wait until i was at least up to 300 on my wellbutrin, cuz that (hopefully little energizing) would counter act the exhaustion zyprexa caused me.

*yeah....sucks...

> but she said i could 'tell the voice/thoughts that. that i just say...
> well you WONT win cuz all i have to do is take this little pill and you are GONE!...NOT me!

**OMG!!!! GOOD T AGAIN!!!!!LOL!!! GOOD answer HA!!!!! LOVE it!!!! Ya when I was on seroquel it WAS so way quieter! It also seemed to work fast too.

> i told her i'd try it. cuz talking back doens't alwyas work...it's like the thoughts know what i'm gonna say and interrupt me with other bad thoughts..like he's talking back..mocking me.

*hmmm. I not so sure it knows....but it wants you to THINK it knows....
I am a step away from my voice at this time, so I can be clear about how MY voice is when its there. At the time it is VERY convincing, and bombards me. But stepping back I can see it does in fact have a fairly limited repetoir and usually tends to wheedle or just try to overwhelm me with 'talk'. Thats why the thot stop works well for me. Cuz when its overwhelming I cannot talk back, but I can yell stop. LOL(or mebbe sad?) but one time I was on the street, being bombarded by the voice and it wouldn't freaking stop, and I was trying in my head so hard to make it stop, but it wouldn't, and it was getting too crazy, so allasudden I YELLED "STOP!!!" OUT LOUD! OMG! Everything stopped all right! Heads all whipped around to look at me! I just kinda pretended to hurry down the street as if the person I had said stop to hadn't heard me and I was hurrying to catch them!!! OH MAN!!!! Now HOW dumb was that!!!!LOL!
>
> thank you all for your great support.
> *******************
> BUT...
> i wanted to say MUFFLED!, you are just the little genius.

*ROFL, not genius, but fellow struggler is all.

> i am printing out your replies and i am going to keep them close. i think these are GREAT!
> i will use them when the time comes.
>
> thank you so very very very much.

* no sweat, you good to me too!
Thanks for the update.
M

 

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poster:muffled thread:792929
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071022/msgs/792986.html