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Re: Coming to terms with CSA - TRIGGER THREAD

Posted by DAisym on October 26, 2007, at 20:59:16

In reply to Re: Coming to terms with CSA emily99, posted by Poet on October 26, 2007, at 19:13:25

I believe that each individual has to decide what "coming to terms" means for them personally. For some, it is to be able to admit to themselves and world what happened. For others it is working past the shock, rage and grief to get to a new understanding of themselves and their history. For others it is getting even somehow - revenge fantasies and all that.

Everyone has a different path to take, and they must clear it on their own but typically, knowing what happened (really knowing, in your body and in your mind), being believed, allowing yourself to feel angry about the "secret" effects, and grieving for the lost trust and innocence will be somewhere on your path. Parts of this path are very narrow and you can only travel it alone - and other times it widens and someone can walk along beside you. When the path is really narrow, it helps to know if you need your therapist, and your friends and/or family to lead for a little while, or to follow along behind you picking up pieces. I've needed both on this journey.

I'm sad to say that it gets hard and painful before it gets better. The full awareness is just so awful - but hold on to the knowledge that you were strong enough to make it through the first time and you can do it again.

How is your sister doing with this, as you've come to believe it? I imagine you might have mixed feelings about her right now.

I agree with everyone else - I'm glad you could post about it.




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