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Re: How do we really forgive ourselves? **csa trigger* antigua3

Posted by RealMe on September 16, 2007, at 17:55:49

In reply to Re: How do we really forgive ourselves? **csa trigger*, posted by antigua3 on September 16, 2007, at 8:38:21

This is the thing for me too. I have not been angry with any of my abusers, four before I turned 17 and then we won't go what else happened at age 17, at least not now. Anyway, I have been trying to talk about stuff in therapy, at least the first two which were prior to age 11. But I don't feel angry. I feel hurt and betrayed, yes, but not angry.

So I just realized yesterday as I was reading and writing stuff that I am feeling very angry with my therapist right now. I think he is going to get the brunt of my anger. Well probably not now that I realize this, but I started to feel angry with him and wanted to tell him I don't need to talk about my brother's physical and sexual abuse, the guy down the street, my mother, etc etc etc. I am sick of it. Let's just forget it, I want to say. I am just too busy now.

I have my job, and it needs me 100% when I am there, and I have been developing a social life, something I have neglected for years. So I just want to tell him to go to hell. That's how it is. I want to quit therapy too. No more.

Maybe I am angry about only once per week for two weeks, but I don't think it is that. I am actually feeling grateful that I have had a chance to recuperate from last Wednesday except of course the food poisoning. Oh well. I wonder what anyone things of this.

antigua, have you gotten angry with your therapist??? I can't remember if you have a male or female therapist. I am thinking it is probably a good thing I do have a male therapist, and I think he knows he is going to get the brunt of some of my anger.





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