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Re: Those icky topics in threapy Sigismund

Posted by Wittgenstein on September 14, 2007, at 1:46:41

In reply to Re: Those icky topics in threapy Wittgenstein, posted by Sigismund on September 13, 2007, at 23:44:10


Thank you for your reply.

" I'm assuming some of that is to do with ageing, and some of that is about character? "

*** I'm 22 so although I'm aging it's got a lot to do with problems I've had since puberty. I guess more to do with character, my relationship with my mother and how such issues were handled while I was growing up.

" You wrote to your T, which means you wanted to approach the subject, for whatever reason. But when he wanted you to talk about it you felt embarrassed and prudish, and now you feel embarrassed for feeling like that."

*** I do need to approach the topic - it's affecting my relationship and my social phobia - on bad days it's a big factor in my not feeling able to go outside.

" Perhaps you have very good reasons for feeling reluctant to discuss this? "

*** Yes, I do. I think the problem for me at the moment is trust - knowing he would understand, and not laugh at me (I'm always afraid he doesn't believe me or is secretly laughing at how pathetic I am). I was made to feel ashamed of myself and my body growing up - and now when I try to talk about this and certain other things it feels like I am trying to feed myself to the sharks. Why should he be any different?

*** I don't know what's normal and what's not. What to expect as a 'normal' reaction. I need him to give me some validation - I so desperately need that but then he sits there in silence or only mutters a few words - it leaves me hanging in the air, while a voice inside me cries out to be comforted. Maybe he assumes I just know what is right and what is not, what is normal and abnormal.

" I had a middle aged female T and that was nice in that there were none of those awful man-to-man exchanges that make for feelings of bad faith.
I didn't give her too much of the salacious stuff, and when I did she was pretty good at paraphrasing. "

*** Your T sounds so understanding. I can see the issues with talking about these things to a T of the same gender. I would find it harder to talk woman-to-woman as trust would be so hard to achieve.

Thanks for your comments.





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