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Re: Monday » Lindenblüte

Posted by ElaineM on November 21, 2006, at 10:03:17

In reply to Re: Monday » ElaineM, posted by Lindenblüte on November 20, 2006, at 16:28:05

Yes, ((((mysterious ways))))

I had a bad night last night. I think I should take more but I don't know if that's dangerous. I thought I'd need to go back today but I really wanted to have called the specialist first. I phoned this morning and they've switched the automatic message to one saying the office will be closed until NEXT MONDAY!!! What is with Docs and their long vacations! So I'm confused about what to do. I *would* like to hold out as long as possible cause I don't want to be seen as an ER troller. I sometimes get scared because after coping with my "other thing" for a year and the dying teeth, my pain tolerance is quite high. I'm used to a baseline of 5. 5 is my 0. So I don't know when I'm being brave or stupid. But I always have my bag ready to go though, just incase.

I feel a little bad, cause T is getting really sad. He sends messages saying he really really misses me. I was gonna try and make it there tomorrow, but if the pain doesn't improve a little again, then I don't think I could tolerate the commute. I wish I hadn't even mentioned the idea. He's not being demanding or anything. And not trying to guilt me into coming. He's just sad. And even though it's messed up, I kinda miss seeing him. He's the only person I see. It's hard missing so many appointments. Days (and nights) are so terribly long and lonely and boring.

blove, EL

ps. Oooo! One thing is that he saw his T and asked more more frequent sessions!!! Yeh!!! He goes bi-weekly now - which is a HUGE difference from once-a-month checkins. So that's good.




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