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Re: Trying to deal with husband's reaction

Posted by Jost on November 18, 2006, at 21:47:14

In reply to Trying to deal with husband's reaction, posted by All Done on November 18, 2006, at 17:57:33

Hi, AllDone.

Towards the end, you say it's as if you've been caught with your hand in the cookie jar. That could be part of what happened-- that you felt a bit defensive and guilty when your husband initially voiced his concerns-- which might come across to your husband as some disturbance or anxiety that you have about your connection to your T.

I mean, your husband might not understand yet and you might need to explain, but it sounds as though he's receptive.

Esp. if he was in a good mood, and that holds up-- he might have been momentarily unsettled, but it also might not be that hard to reassure him. Unless you feel a little "disloyal" to him, or as if you shouldn't need, or have such an intimate connection to, anyone else. That's not true, but I understand the feeling.

It could be that if you feel okay when you tell your husband, and are letting him know rather than justifying something (that you yourself don't quite feel okay about), he'll be able to listen and accept it-- even if he has some bit of uncertainty of his own.

He could pick up on your being comfortable or not-- as a clue to whether the relationship is safe and non-threatening.





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