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Re: Eeek no. I just can't think about it. Daisym

Posted by 10derHeart on November 14, 2006, at 14:51:53

In reply to Re: Eeek no. I just can't think about it. Dinah, posted by Daisym on November 11, 2006, at 16:21:20

>>Now it is more of a toddler stage - I'm upright on my own two feet - but I still need to cling to his leg every now and then to rebalance myself. I've ventured further into the past than I ever have before and I've made huge changes in my present and for my future. He remains my "safe base" that I return to again and again.

Rapprochement. The stage of development that's always resonated with me more than anything else I ever read about children's psychological development. And the term my ex-T. used numerous times to reflect back what he heard me saying about my needing to know where he was between sessions, how he was, if he home in the work when he was supposed to be...still there...thus the 'driving by' behaviors I ultimately confessed to him.

I remember reading examples and explanations of this stage in text books and other kinds of books on child development and having tears just flow down my face...and being shocked. I mean, these weren't personalized stories about certain toddlers and/or moms you would identify with, these were pretty much clinical writings, yet they did something to me to where I couldn't stand to read them any more as the longing and anxiety was too intense. Still can't. And inexplicable, for the most part, to me and two Ts. Because as far as what I know of my childhood, there's no reason whatsoever for such an over-the-top reaction. But, we understand so little, really, and remember less, so who knows?Hmmm...eeek...yuk...too scary.




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