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Re: Well, I'm not rejecting you Kerria, » Phillipa

Posted by kerria on November 12, 2006, at 21:02:16

In reply to Re: Well, I'm not rejecting you Kerria, » kerria, posted by Phillipa on November 12, 2006, at 18:16:04

> Kerria who has to go there? Can you tell that part no? Love Phillipa

Hi Phillipa,

It's an online support group that we've been going to for a long time- intermittently because sometimes i end up doing so badly that they throw me out- once it was for something someone else said who wanted to get me thrown out. The administration thought i was s. and banned me for a while- i wasn't. People can say anything in a thread- the thread last week had about ninety posts- only a few were mine- mostly they posted one person after another- then others joined in that i never even heard of before saying mean things.

i'm so hurt- i wish someone would help staighten out the unfair thingssss- the wrong things - the mean things so i can go back.

i think most don't want me back. tears.

the girl who is new who said the worst things to me - the sarcastic things just to hurt me said that she would never take back what she said- i feel so hurt by her. i wonder why she's so mean to me- she doesn't even know me. i was the first person who welcomed her to the site and i never had any disagreement with her or anyone else there ever.

There's not a place at a support group for hurting people- we're already hurt- that's why we go.
She's different- and the others are saying that's good. 'be yourself' (even if it hurts me- i don't matter to them) tears .

so many things are going wrong in my life now- i need support from somewhere- i'm leaving T- not a very supportive T but the only one who talks to my parts- who knows me. i feel so terrible. the pain is so bad that i couldn't manage to go to church- or anywhere- it's so triggering- i feel so sad and hurt like i was just a.
There's no one to understand

Phillipa, i never had a time when things were so dark- so many bad things at the same time.

not a lot of persons know what it's like to have to live with separate parts. it's hard not going there. then no one understands anywhere. Even T doesn't understand like a person with parts does.

it makes it easier to take living with all the misunderstanding and the mess.

Now the support group is the mess too. we have no where.

i feelso left out. so much will change with every day. i'm so depressed about so many things.

you're a friend to everyone. thank you for caring to talk to me. sorry i'm so depressed.
i hope that things are ok with you.
Thanks so much for listening,




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