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Re: Diagnoses » Declan

Posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 14:29:35

In reply to Diagnoses, posted by Declan on November 12, 2006, at 13:31:05

Well, my current T has never given me a label or a syndrome or anything. She talks to me about experiences, and thoughts and behavior and feelings.

I asked my oldT point-blank a few times about my diagnosis. After a month of psychotherapy, he reluctantly said, I'm considering either major depression or dysthymia. (I was sorry i asked)

I'm pretty sure that oldT is forced to stick me with a diagnostic code so that I can get services paid for by my insurance. So he gave me a kind of generic diagnosis.

I'm pretty sure that I fit different diagnostic criteria every couple of weeks. Right now, I fit diagnostic criteria for caffeine intoxication. A month or so ago, depersonalization syndrome, la di la.

I think your T's got the right idea. I'm not sure that the DSM-IV makes an appropriate distinction between symptoms that are acute and present (like when I was "MDD". Now that I'm not crying, losing weight, losing sleep, having problems concentrating, etc, I'm not sure why I would be classified as having MDD. Yet, I'm still taking an anti-depressant.

Is it like cancer? Is it like an infection? Is it like an auto-immune disorder?

I think my mind (and my mental illness) is like a performance of a concerto. Kind of predictable. You know the tunes, but sometimes it moves too fast, and sometimes it moves too slowly. Sometimes all is going well, and sometimes the soloist breaks a string or the horn player cracks on a high note. Heaven forbid if the conductor should lose her place, or the soloist forget his memorized part. The oboe may tune the orchestra to the wrong frequency. All kinds of things can go wrong. One forms an opinion of the piece and the performance as it unfolds. As soon as the concert is over, it may be immediately recognized as outstanding, or this realization may not come to mind until a few days or years later.

Too complicated to assign a number to, at any rate.

Crazy brains on sale: $4.99 a pound.





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