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Re: I'm afraid I might be getting better :(

Posted by Jost on November 10, 2006, at 22:37:57

In reply to Re: I'm afraid I might be getting better :(, posted by Dinah on November 10, 2006, at 19:59:08

Would you ask why you need your parent (assuming your parent loved you in a reasonably good way and you loved your parent)?

I know most people think they pay a therapist to help them work on their problems.

But that leaves out the existential (not the best word, but the one that comes to mind) quality of the relationship.

Therapy relationships vary much as any relationship does. Sometimes, you're close to someone for a limited purpose, or with limited connection within defined time periods. Other times, you come together with someone and it takes on a more sustained or sustaining meaning, and becomes something without those limits of defined and delineated goal, or time.

If that's the type of relationship you have with your therapist, my question is how could you not need him? why would you think you could/should end the relationship?

I know it's a weirdly constituted relationship, given how we define and create relationships in "normal" social/familial life. It's by no means right for everyone-- or even most people-- just as you rarely can create those relationships in any sphere, or under any conditions.

So I can only say, if you've managed to do it-- why would you want not to need it? or want to do without it-- if something beyond your control wasn't forcing you to?

It's like joke about the exam in philosophy, which asked the question: why? to which the only answer is "because"-- (or, if you're a skeptic, "why not").





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