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Re: llrrrpp and LarH

Posted by llrrrpp on May 12, 2006, at 22:34:41

In reply to Re: llrrrpp and LarH Larry Hoover, posted by pegasus on May 12, 2006, at 19:44:18

This is all very interesting. Something at my last session with T kind of freaked me out. I asked him point-blank "so, what's our plan here? what are we doing"? He replied, "Well, for now I'm just here to be supportive of you and help you through this difficult time. I think that over the last 2 weeks, the therapy and medication itself has been traumatic, and you're still getting over that. Once your crisis is over, the *real work* can begin"

Holy Moly, so all the "blah blah" about my stress and my life and my family has all been a grand prelude? It's been an introduction? Oh boy. This is going to be really hard. I don't know if I'm strong enough to give voice to things that have been covert so long that they're calcified. I'm not sure I want anyone listening to this. At times T is listening kindly and nodding, other times he really challenges me and tells me very bluntly that I'm mistaken or misled. I can never tell when supportive-listening-T will morph into challenging-in-your-face-impatient-T. I don't think I'm strong enough to handle this. What's more is that my memory is so screwed up right now that I'm not sure what's a real memory and what's a confabulation. I find it really hard to concentrate and keep up a coherent stream of thought in everyday life (cognitive impairment due to major depression), and the face to face dialog is a major cognitive load. Taxing to my limited resources. Well, at least T seems invested and motivated to help me recover. He seems confident that I will get better. That's reassuring.




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