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Re: I feel so repulsive to look at my old posts :-( annierose

Posted by orchid on May 11, 2006, at 12:40:18

In reply to Re: I feel so repulsive to look at my old posts :-(, posted by annierose on May 10, 2006, at 18:51:28

> You shouldn't feel "repulsed" by your former posts. At that time, it reflected your feelings and struggles.


Orchid
Thanks Annie. I know it reflects what I went through, but it is so hard to make peace with it. Every time I try to read back my old posts, I cringe in shame.
>
> This is just my obversation, but I think you still have lingering conflicting feelings for your first therapist and the work you had done together. You seem to flip back and forth between hating the theraputic process and appreciating what you learned. I mean this only as an obversation and I hope you are not offended because I mean no harm.

----Orchid
It is true. Sometimes I think of him very well and in good regards and have very deep gratitude. But other times I just totally hate him for making me go through this much pain and suffering. I kind of oscillate.

>
> Since I am still in therapy, I too swing back and forth between loving my therapist and hating her. Luckily, I get to express these different emotions with her, and we get to work on them together. Yes, sometimes it's embarassing how intensely I feel around some stuff. But it is so rewarding when I get my head around it, and began to see things more clearly.

---Orchid

Thanks for your inputs annie.


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