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Re: tranference or real feelings? (***SI trigger** Tamar

Posted by wishingstar on March 11, 2006, at 21:03:26

In reply to Re: tranference or real feelings? (***SI trigger** wishingstar, posted by Tamar on March 11, 2006, at 17:30:29

Thanks for the response.. I agree, its definitely not her job to take responsibility for my actions. She asked to see my SI once and after we discussed why that wasnt helpful for me (it motivated it, in a way) she never asked to see again.. but now she wont even ask about the topic at all, and seems reluctant to discuss it. I mentioned last week that I think I sort of shot myself in the foot by telling her I dont like to show it.. maybe she thinks she shouldnt talk about it at all. I dont know. It's too scary to talk about hard things because then.. its out there, but I still feel alone with it. I need her to help me talk about these things.

Those are good questions you raised. I might ask her that next time I see her. But she has very strong boundaries, so I doubt I'd ever get anything about any countertransferece out of her. I guess it doesnt hurt to try.

You're right about the label of transference feeling dismissive. It feels like it was just another instance in which she didnt really hear me. Maybe I'm not being clear enough with her, because I know I worry too much about her feelings.. who knows. I dont really think thats it though.

Why does therapy have to be so confusing? In a way, I feel like you all are hearing me MUCH more than she does sometimes. It helps. Thank you.


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