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Re: Why do I fall into a dark hole? childabuse trigger happyflower

Posted by daisym on March 9, 2006, at 20:07:42

In reply to Why do I fall into a dark hole? childabuse trigger, posted by happyflower on March 9, 2006, at 9:42:42

I think you said it yourself -- you try very hard and trying isn't enough...getting yelled at is unpleasant for most people. But when your past includes things like abuse, yelling is the first step towards hitting and other nasty stuff. Of course you were triggered. Who wouldn't be?

I think you did a tremendous job of sticking with it and getting through the concert. Even if you hadn't played perfectly, your courage at trying should be applauded. I think I would have bolted and never gone back.

My son's therapist is constantly reminding me that the goal isn't that M doesn't have anxiety. It is that he feels it, and keeps going anyway. Which is exactly what you did. You can see where it came from and that you can get through it. Now, hopefully, you won't go down so low each time and, hopefully, each time will be shorter and shorter.

I hope your therapist helps you feel better on Monday.




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