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Re:To Susan unrequited/sort of) Love with my Thera

Posted by allisonross on October 21, 2005, at 12:36:34

In reply to Re: To:FW: (Unrequited/sort of) Love with my Therapist allisonross, posted by Susan47 on October 20, 2005, at 19:45:46

> Hi, Susan; still getting used to the board, here; hope I'm doing this right! LOL
I know it's easy to believe what you think and what you feel about your therapist is real, no matter what he says. Would it make you feel awful if you realized that what he meant when he said hugging might feel too good, that he was talking about your feelings, not his?

I know he meant himself (because of his explanation; no need to go into details, etc.)

Well, I know what I am real......I have loved him for 2 years, but kept the boundaries; as I told him; if I had met him elsewhere, I would have been attracted to him, etc.....we are alike in so many ways; told him I felt t HE was ME in male form! However feel I can say anything to him (which shows how sensitive and forthcoming he is). I know he is human and not a god.

> Just wondering.
> Sounds like you might do well to start looking for another therapist, I'm serious, because this sounds like it could lead to a lot of pain, especially if he lets you down and terminates you. The reason won't matter, if he does that. He sounds like he might have tremendous reserves of compassion, but be careful with transferring too much eroticism onto him.

Unfortunately, this has led to a lot of pain for me, but I cannot help it.. Feelings are facts. i cannot help that I love him, only how I behave because of it......As i said, we have discussed this in depth. He does have tremendous reserves of compassion, etc. He said: "my colleagues would say to run fast....and far...but I will NEVER abandon you."

As for "transferring eroticism on him" Not sure I understand. Can you elaborate? Thanks so much! Hugs, Smiles...P.S. i read a book called; Erotic Transference (fascinating)...basically, when it all boils down, we are all....simply people/human; my t said that "therapy is a sexual dance" I believe (and not because of my feelings for him) that he is the most brilliant t there is!




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