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Re: Anybody else have very little feelings?

Posted by happyflower on October 18, 2005, at 10:20:57

In reply to Anybody else have very little feelings?, posted by fairywings on October 18, 2005, at 9:39:01

((((((((Fairywings)))))) You are not heartless and cold! You are very caring person who I like a lot. You are being so hard on yourself, I wish I could convince you that I think you are a wonderful pal.
I think before therapy, all I mostly felt was anger and sadness. I think it overwhelmed all the other emotions that might have been there, but the anger was overbearing them. I felt numb. I think this is common for people who have been abused as a child. But I didn't realize this until after therapy though. But since I have worked through my abuse issues, the sadness lifted from my life. I feel now, and at first it was scarey for me. I think I still need to control the good feelings though because it can go overboard.
I think playing trumpet, has also helped me get in touch with my emotions. When I first started to play, I just cried because I was feeling once again. Playing the trumpet used to mean everything to me, it was my life. But I quit, and I quit doing everything that meant something to me. I just wrapped my life around my DH and kids. I don't regret that, but I lost myself along the way. Now I feel more like me.

I think you have other feelings, Jazzy, but I think the sadness is masking them right now. You are in a tough spot in therapy. It could be a turning point for you. Please hang in there, I just know you will find it so worth it in the end. Please trust me on this one, I think you have a good T, and you will feel much better after you see him. I am keeping my fingers crossed for good luck for you! :)




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