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Re: Your therapist **trigger** Pfinstegg

Posted by fairywings on October 18, 2005, at 9:07:07

In reply to Your therapist, posted by Pfinstegg on October 17, 2005, at 14:57:13

> I don't think he is actually doing therapy - he's just telling you to accept everything that's happened and move on. This can feel very invalidating and dismissive, >

Thanks pfinstegg,

I did feel very invalidated. I see him this week, and I've written him a note. If he doesn't respond the way I think he should, or satisfactorily, then I will tell him I don't see any point in continuing. I don't understand why he was the way he was with me. I hope he'll explain to me. I just don't understand how you can just move on after over 18 years of abuse. But the anger toward my parents and the fear from the rape are what is constantly with me. I could quit doing therapy about it, but that wouldn't make it better.

> I know you haven't gone to him very long, but I would think that he would be trying to help you feel more deeply, and validate your feelings, himself, at this point. Attachment is important in healing, too.

Up until this last appt. he did validate me, that's why I was so thrown by his response, BUT he'd already let my mom off the hook because he said she was abused by my dad, but often her abuse was worse than my dad's. He did tell me that somehow I need to get in touch with the feelings, but didn't tell me how to do that, or say we were going to work on it. So I"m incredibly confused.

>>If what you've described is his style, every time, what about another T? Some sessions of EMDR at the same time might help a lot, too.

I'll see what he says this week, and see if it's time to move on. It's odd that I haven't attached to him a bit.




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