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I don't feel the same way

Posted by Dinah on October 16, 2005, at 21:43:38

I'm not sure if I said this before or not. I'm a bit hazy on who I've said what to.

But my therapist told me I could email him while he was away, and gave me an email address specifically for this time period.

I had emailed him about some updates on some things we had talked about re. finding another therapist, etc. and he happened to reply just after I found out my father in law was dying, and while I was sitting at the computer. So I emailed him about it. His reply was pretty quick, and basically consisted of something along the lines of "I'm sorry, but I've got problems too you know." And proceeded to tell me those problems, which appeared to be monetary in nature. Which didn't seem to be the right response to information about a dying relative. Not even from a casual aquaintance, and certainly not to a client who's paid you at least 10k a year for years.

He ended by asking me if that was too much information. I responded politely, including the observation that the boat of strict boundaries had probably sailed a while back now. And expressed genuine and proper concern about his problems. His response to that, and to my subsequent email to him that my aunt had died in a fire, were brief and polite and very circumspect and superficial.

I don't know. I just don't feel the same way about him now.

I don't know how fair that is.

It's been almost a week now. I haven't contacted him again, and have no intention of doing so. We have an appointment for the sixth of November, and I intend to keep it. I don't want to lose the connection or feel differently about him.

But I do.




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