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Re: How are you doing FW? happyflower

Posted by fairywings on October 16, 2005, at 18:57:54

In reply to How are you doing FW?, posted by happyflower on October 15, 2005, at 20:49:46

Thanks everyone, I appreciate your thoughts. I've spent the weekend trying to sort through some things. I've come to some conclusions and I am going to go to my appt next week, but I do feel very pushed away by him. I wrote things out because I just don't think I can talk to him, I'm too mad.

He told me that because my dad was sick he couldn't help what he did, that he didn't choose to be a bad parent, or choose to treat me badly. Even though he knows he treated my older siblings just fine. He said that my dad could have just chosen to disappear, but he didn't. He said that I need to focus on the good times in order to move on, and that at some point I needed to accept things. He's already taken my mom out of the equation because he says she was abused by my dad, so I guess he thinks it was okay for her to take things out on me too.

Now I feel like I'm not entitled to my feelings. I had to deny them for the first part of my life, and I have to do it again? I'm sorry I ever got into this. I was better off before I tried to fix things in therapy.

My husband says I need to give him the benefit of the doubt, but I'm just too angry right now.





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