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Re: How does he help you overcoming these feelings daisym

Posted by Dinah on October 15, 2005, at 7:55:55

In reply to Re: How does he help you overcoming these feelings? orchid, posted by daisym on October 15, 2005, at 0:21:15

One reason I terminated T2 was that I could hear some of those thoughts in her questions. "Are you really better off than you were before you started therapy?" "Tell me what you were like before you started therapy." Then questions about why I continued to use negative coping skills.

Legitimate questions, I suppose, and ones I think of myself. But very hard to explain in terms of how I have improved, and how I haven't.

I think it's kind of usual even for professionals to have certain ideas about what therapy should and shouldn't be. Even if they say they approve of long term therapy, or supportive therapy. Because intense long term therapy does reveal vulnerabilities before it heals them, and sometimes it's hard to see how that can be helpful. And sometimes it reveals vulnerabilities and doesn't seem to be helping them.

With me, I explain that the helping, the growing, is at glaciar speed. It can't be rushed. Quick changes, in me, are not lasting ones. And maybe lasting changes are as simple as realizing I'm having problems and taking steps to mitigate them. Increasing my meds or whatever. Not exactly the stuff of therapy success stories.

But pretty significant to my own life.

What do I mean by this? I don't know.

I guess that it's ok to consider these questions from time to time in any therapy (which I know you do). But then to do what you, in your considered opinion, believe is best for you in the long run. Which is easier said than done, I know.

And then to realize that there are reasons people ask the questions. (And then to terminate therapists who ask them. Har har har.)




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