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Re: The same old circle » Tamar

Posted by cricket on October 13, 2005, at 14:05:00

In reply to Re: The same old circle » cricket, posted by Tamar on October 13, 2005, at 4:39:27

Thanks Tamar. It's good to hear from you.

> Gosh, what a difficult session! It seems it’s a good thing that you let the adolescent girl speak. But it sounds as if she’s somewhat justified in being uncertain of your therapist.
> I’m a little astonished that he didn’t seem to realise that to an adolescent girl he would seem like an authority figure. And that he didn’t seem to understand how prejudices work institutionally in schools. I thought everybody knew that in this day and age. I guess that’s one of *my* prejudices… I’m glad you (and your adolescent part) are putting him right.
> The stories you tell of school are heartbreaking. Were you the only one who was ‘different’? Or were there other kids in your school who experienced similar injustices?
No, not really. Not in elementary school anyway. Weird zoning. We were in this isolated shack on the edge of this major country club/3 car garage type suburb.

> Maybe your therapist does have a lot of work to do. Maybe it will be a lot of work for him to understand experiences that are evidently so completely different from his own. Maybe the ‘if we decide to do this’ isn’t so much an indication that he might give up on you, but an indication of his recognition that working with you might require him to learn new skills.
I just wonder if he will decide it's just not worth it at his I guess you would say mid-career level. It's not like he's trying to build a practice or anything.

> Well, I’m kind of glad he’s not saying that! But it seems as if you’re having to be awfully patient with him at the moment. From everything you’ve said before, he’ll probably get there in a little while. It must be frustrating to have to wait for him to catch up. On the other hand, you’ve invested a lot in the relationship over the years. And I hope that once he does sort it out in his own mind he’ll realise that your adolescent part needs to be allowed to express her rage. And if she directs it towards him, he needs to be able to help her look to past experience to explore the sources of it.
> It does sound as if you’re working really hard in therapy at the moment. Good for you!
Tamar, there is always so much wisdom in what you say. As you can see in my post below, I have a fear that my therapist might be reading here. But I wish he was here to read your posts. Perhaps I can send you his address :-)




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