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Re: Therapy Experts!!?? rainbowbrite

Posted by Dinah on October 7, 2005, at 5:05:24

In reply to Re: Therapy Experts!!?? orchid, posted by rainbowbrite on October 6, 2005, at 14:53:23

I've learned to come out and ask for what I need.

For instance, my therapist finds long silences comfortable and assumes I'm reflecting. When in reality I'm thinking something like "Why isn't he saying anything? What is he thinking? Well, I'm not going to be the first to say something. I said something last and now it's his turn. Say something d*mnit!!"

But over time I've learned that when I start thinking those thoughts to instead say "Your silence isn't what I need right now. Could you comment on what I said, or even change the subject please?"

Which often gets a response along the lines of why silence wouldn't be comfortable to me at that moment or why I didn't say something. But at least that's *something*.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:563698
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051001/msgs/563976.html