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Re: in love with therpist isla

Posted by alexandra_k on June 13, 2005, at 17:58:35

In reply to in love with therpist, posted by isla on June 13, 2005, at 16:47:34

Hiya Isla, welcome to Babble :-)

I think session length can vary but yours do sound rather long. I have had sessions that long before but that was because I need a bit of time to get into the session and to wind things up afterwards.

> He refuses to refer me to someone else and tells me my feelings are not real.

Hmm. A 'refusal' is strange. Did he talk to you about why you thought you might be better to see someone else? Sometimes people want to do that when they are talking about hard stuff as a way of avoiding it. In the latter case then it probably isn't productive to switch, but you need to think about why you want to switch.

With respect to telling you that your feelings 'aren't real' that doesn't really help them feel less real! Transference feelings are something that people talk about on the boards quite a lot. It can be hard. Thats partly why people are reading the 'in session' book - because she talks about this.

>Sometimes when I want to leave the session he does not let me go.

Hmm. I guess that if you are 'running away' from hard stuff that might be appropriate. But if you want to leave because you are feeling fed up with him and he won't really help you process stuff then it sounds to me like you might be better off with seeing someone else with or without a referral from him.

>I feel that he wants me to keep needing him and to not move forward. We discuss the same things over and over.

That would be a very good reason to stop going IMO.

Have you tried to talk to him about how seriously you are thinking about some of this stuff? Maybe you could print out your post and give it to him and say that you want to talk about that because you really are starting to wonder how much progress you are making.

>He talks for most of the session and interrupts me quite frequently. This gets me very frustrated and angry. He is always telling me how I feel and how I am.

That doesn't sound good to me.

And what is puzzling... Is that after all that you still like him. I suspect that you might well be better off working with someone else who can listen and control their frustration and anger a bit better.




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