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Re: Approximate relationships

Posted by cricket on June 7, 2005, at 10:08:10

In reply to Re: Approximate relationships cricket, posted by Dinah on June 6, 2005, at 20:44:51

Hi Dinah,

Glad to have you back.

I too have a lot of cordial relationships, for the exact same reason you mention - my own emotional withdrawal. For now, it's what helps me function in the world. I do wonder if one day I will ever be able to have anything else.

I am so sorry to hear that wasn't a great session. When do you see him next? I guess one of the advantages of going more than once a week is that it feels like there is less riding on every session.

It is interesting that you said you didn't feel close. Was that before his "relationship unreal" comment? I am wondering if he was somehow reacting to your own shut down. Sometimes I feel like my therapist does that. I go in feeling like I don't want to talk to him, refusing to reveal any of myself, but another part of me is desperately looking for closeness. My therapist distances himself I think he would say out of respect for the part of me that wants to withdraw, but it winds up feeling punitive to the part that is desperate to be close. Is it anything like that?

If you have a chance, Jazzed posted an article in a thread for Pinkeye - towards the bottom of the list. It's about PTSD, but it has a couple of interesting charts on attachment styles of both clients and therapists. I would love to get your thoughts on it, because it seems we both struggle with the same attachment issues, even if they manifest themselves in different ways.


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