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Re: Just curious about therapy failures LOL rainbowbrite

Posted by messadivoce on June 6, 2005, at 12:21:49

In reply to Just curious about therapy failures LOL, posted by rainbowbrite on June 5, 2005, at 13:44:48

Well, I'm glad that people here can laugh at their therapy "failures". I had my own therapy failure when I was 16. I was experiencing the hallmark signs of depression/sucide and my folks found me an MFT. Being ignorant I didn't know what questions to ask, I just went with the process. My dad is in the clergy and there is a deep suspicion of psychologists/therapists in my denomination, so this woman was "safe" b/c she ascribed to our beliefs.

She certainly avoided certain issues (such as family history) and focused mainly on stuff I was experiencing at school and church. I think it would have only taken one or two probing questions to get to the heart of my sadness, but there were unspoken boundaries in there about what we would and would not talk about. I thought, okay, maybe this is the way therapy is supposed to work.

I think I got a moment of clarity that she was not the right T when before a session, I ran into someone I knew in her waiting room (she shared a waitingn room with other Ts). I went into my session feeling uneasy and embarrassed about seeing this person, and mentioned it at the beginning of my session. I told her I was embarrassed that someone knew I was here in therapy and she actually ROLLED her EYES at me and then refused to even discuss it!! Had she had any discernment at ALL she could have picked up on the guilt and shame I felt about...everything.

She terminated me 2 months later, claming I was okay again, but unfortunately she didn't leave me with any "tools" (except bad CBT techniques) and I soon lapsed back into depression. Only this time I got better at hiding it, and it was a good 3 years before I was able to admit to myself that it was NOT normal to, for example, cry over the spaghetti while I was cooking it.

That was my therapy failure. But even though I may get a C for effort, she gets an F.

That was when I found my 2nd T, and I did absoutely no research on therapy, but it turned out okay. Mostly because he was the right one for me. I lucked out. But I think it was God, too.


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poster:messadivoce thread:507991
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050606/msgs/508483.html