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Re: Other aspects of Chapter 2 daisym

Posted by Dinah on May 27, 2005, at 4:22:46

In reply to Re: Other aspects of Chapter 2, posted by daisym on May 27, 2005, at 1:32:58

> The disproportionate importance of small things -
> Yes! Like reading into a sigh. or a change in voice tone. I don't care about the decor and I rearrange the couch pillows the way *I* want them.

Me too!! And often they stay that way. I'd think it was territorial behavior, except that I really do like to burrow in the corner of the sofa. It's safer there.

> Attachment and dependency -
> *****Again, a huuuge topic for me. Probably the centerpiece of most of the work we've done, it's so huge. He was an excellent object for all of that to be played out on. When Lott quoted the young woman who said "I fear coming to her office and finding a note that she will no longer be seeing clients." I had to smile in recognition. I've probably had every conceivable scenario involving my therapist leaving me run through my head at least once. And driven him crazy by bringing them to therapy.
> >>>>OK, you already know -- ME TOO!! I'm shocked, shocked! that this has happened to me. I've said the note thing to my therapist -- I'm worried I will get here and find a note, "Gone fishing." His response was, "I hate fishing." :) But I still have that fear, or the fear that I'm there on the wrong day or wrong time. And I consider time slots "mine" so I don't want them given away if I can't make it, or if I change. Not rational, not rational at all. I'm really glad that my therapist is so OK with this gigantic attachment I have. I don't want to be pushed away or set back. He told me once that he keeps hoping I will just accept the dependency and sink into it and let myself need him. Then we can really get to work. I wish more of my friends IRL who have or are in therapy had this issue. Or if they do, I wish they would talk about it. I feel like the therapy patient you hear jokes about, clinging and upset if they don't have access to their therapist.

What amazes me is how inventive my mind can be. If there are fifty ways to leave your lover, there must be thousands of ways to be abandoned by your therapist. :)

> We have the same sense of humor and we are both quick to quip. I want to believe we have similar values, but for all I really know, he swings naked in the trees on the weekends. I suspect he likes nature more than I do because he laughed really hard when I said I only camp at Hiltons.

I think I'm kind of lucky that way. I know darn well I wouldn't like him as a friend or other intimate, and I know darn well he wouldn't like me that way. It makes things so much clearer, you know?




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poster:Dinah thread:491935